(Closed) If I could do it all over again…

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 4
Member
8042 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

@MrsBeck:  Ugh, that sucks.

On the bright side, it is only one day. Yeah it’s supposed to be the best day of your life or whatever, but if you think about it, it really is only a few hours, right?

I am sure you will have a wonderful time despite all the additional people. And there are so many coming that it’s not like you’ll be expected to talk to each and every one. Just hang out with the people you want to. That’s what I would do. And who knows, maybe you’ll get to know some of them and it’ll start a great new friendship/relationship.

Post # 5
Member
12 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@MrsBeck:  I understand where you are coming from as my parents have absolutely insisted on paying for all of our wedding, and although they say they want us to plan it how we like, they are already trying to get really involved in picking the venue etc. and my FI and I are starting to feel pressured.  I just keeping thinking that everyone says your wedding day just flies by and that the things you thought might bother you (like too many guests) you don’t even notice because the day is so full on and exciting…  It is hard though as planning a wedding is something you want to feel like you have control over, but at the end of it all, it is just one day and if you focus on spending the time with the people you really wanted there I’m sure it will be great! 

Post # 7
Member
8464 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@MrsBeck:  I think most people will understand that you’re busy spending time with everyone that day, especially since it’s such a large wedding.

Post # 8
Member
2376 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

There’s no changing the guest list now, so just try to focus on the positives.  The important thing is that you’re marrying the person you love, and you’ll still get to celebrate with your friends.  Make sure you visit every table during the reception, and thank your guests.  I don’t know if you’re having a receiving line as well, but it’s nice to stop by the tables and just say hi.  It’s only a minute or two per table, so you’ll still get to spend time with your friends and close family members. 

Post # 10
Member
1177 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@MrsBeck:  Just do a receiving line. Then you’ll get greeting everyone out of the way at the beginning, super-efficiently, and no one will feel slighted. I have been to many weddings where the couple eschewed the receiving line because it was “too formal” but then made themselves crazy running around trying to greet everyone, and invariably missed some people and felt bad about it later.

Post # 11
Member
272 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Our wedding is in July and my mom is doing the same thing. We wanted to have a small wedding, but my family is huge so we know it probably wasn’t going to happen. I was pretty ok with the guest list until my mom started trying at add on her co-workers and great aunts I haven’t seen in forever. I’m putting my foot down, and telling her we can’t invite them because one we want to keep it as small as possible, and two we’re actually approaching the limit of the number of people the building can hold comfortably. The ceremony is going to be outdoors (hopefully), in the field attached to the reception building. She keeps insisting that not everyone will want to sit down at the same time and that some people will stay outside anyways.
 
So, can you see where I might be having a problem with this? lol
The best part, me and FI and paying for 99% of the wedding.

Post # 13
Member
2376 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Usually the table visits are after the meal.  You don’t want to prevent your guests from eating, and you want to make sure you’ve had a chance to eat too!  I hate to say it like this, but you don’t actually need to know who they are – it’s just pleasantries.  They tell you how beautiful the ceremony was, how pretty you look, the food was delicious, etc.  You thank them for coming, if you know they’re out of town, ask how the trip was, that sort of thing.  Smile a lot, and off you go.  If you haven’t actually been introduced, your parents should go with you and introduce their friends.  If they don’t, it’s no big deal, they’ll usually say ‘Oh, I’m John, I work with your father’ and it goes from there.

Post # 15
Member
845 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I understand.  I’m actively hoping 1/2 of the people we invited aren’t coming. 

 

Post # 16
Member
2376 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@MrsBeck:  I wouldn’t worry too much.  As long as you make an effort, people will be happy.  If someone’s leaving early, they’ll usually come up to you and at say hi/goodbye.

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