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I feel the same thing when people ask me, "How's the wedding planning going?" I'm getting married in 2 months I'm done planning. I'm more stressed about the actions I have to take to complete all of the planning I did earlier. LOL
i'm NYE, but my guy and i have been together for 8 years, so we get asked when we are going to get married all the time. i'll bloody tell you when i'm engaged. (NOTE: he wants to get engaged now, but i am making him wait until i lose weight. sounds silly but important to me)
I hear you!!! The most annoying to me are...
How's married life?
Does it feel any different?
When are you having babies?
or I'll make a comment about SOMETHING (not feeling well, being tired, etc...) and the first thing I hear is "Maybe you're pregnant!".
"Isn't that really expensive?" re: anything wedding related. If we're the ones paying for it, why do you care!?
Sunshine 23:I get that pregnancy comment all the time when I say ANYTHING is off with me. I find it so annoying! I hate the "when are you going to have babies?" bit too. Didnt your mother ever tell you it was rude to ask about other peoples sex lives?
UHHH totally agree with the MONEY questions, HOW CRASS!
Have you started dieting yet?? (Ummm seriously?)
OOOO and
ARE YOU NERVOUS? (No I'm not, I'm marrying my best friend!)
@Mrs.Tillmann: my friend's mother in law kept asking her this so she eventually told her she had fertility issues and was unable to conceive (not true) lol.
Oh yeah; well not long ago we went to a next morning brunch for the bride and groom. They opened their gifts and one of the Brides Family gave them a onesie; socks & a croncrete babies first hand print making kit.... yeah that was a little odd to me... lol
Oh yeah; & I'm guilty of the "How's Married Life" question.... lol guess i'll think twice before I ask again...
I HATE this question!!!!! I always say "its normal" or "its the same" because I would rather not talk about something that people that are not married, engaged or in a relationship cant understand!
I DETEST being asked, "So, how's the wedding planning going?" I feel like (a) they don't really want me to go into detail, nor do I (e.g. "Well, things are going pretty well. Today I need to sned my photographer a cheque for the final balance, and then I have to sign off on my signage for the reception." Um, boring), and (b) I never feel like I can say anything other than. "Great, thanks." Like, really, what else is there to say?!
Drives me NUTS!
@Sunshine23: I feel you! God forbid I say anything about being tired or my stomach hurting everyone will ask me, "Are you pregnant?! Maybe you're pregnant!!"...uh, no!
I was just thinking this today! I always answer "the same" and usually the asker doesn't really have anything to day and I can walk away! hahahahaha
my two most hated questions:
"how does it FEEL to be married???" --- um the same it felt to be shacking up and living in sin for the last few years... just now he REALLY cant go anywhere... LOL
"or how many kids are yall gonna have???" --- um try NONE... i hate children. (well hate is a strong word, we just dont want any.....
I hated "Are you knocked up yet?" The fact is that, yes we were... but it was no one else's business until we made it so.
@hergreenapples: I agree, but I was guilty of this when people I knew were getting married. Now I realize how annoying it is!
I'm hating the planning process and I have a problem of telling people exactly how I feel. I end up telling them that I hate the process and that it's very stressful. Then I get the pity looks....oh just ask for help, or oh, it's will all come together. Yeah no kidding it will, because I've busted my ass on it!
That sort of turned into a vent....
Oh the "how's married life?" question is just strange! It's normal. We share space and stuff, but not a ton has changed. And it sure hasn't changed from when you asked me 2 weeks ago.
I'm also starting to get the babies question lately and I quickly explain that kiddos are a long ways out until I'm done with my masters and law school.
I don't mind the "how's married life?" To me, it's the same as the generic "How are you?" but a touch more personalized. What I hate is people asking us when we are going to have kids. I keep trying to come up with good responses. Next time I am asked, I want to say, "Oh, we don't discuss our sex life in public," but I will probably chicken out.
I actually like answering the HOW'S MARRIED LIFE question, but then I think I start telling them more than they want to know.
Now it's always, WHEN ARE YOU DUE? ( I should say, Why, are you going to get us a present?)
or DO YOU KNOW IF IT'S A GIRL OR A BOY? (a girl, so they say but you never know until it pops out)
@guitargirl: funny! you should! :)
For several months after I got married, when people would ask me the inevitable, "How's Married Life" question, I'd respond, " I Wouldn't know."
After they got a wonderful shocked look on their face, I'd explain that my husband is a CPA and I haven't seen him for more than a few hours at a time. By the time tax season ended, no one cared anymore. Though I totally feel the "when are you having babies" questions - I got sick at a friend's wedding and the first thing she asked is, are you pregnant??? No, just one too many cocktails and not enough food at your cocktain hour!
People keep asking me if I feel any different. It's like "Well I have a sinus infection at the moment so I don't feel anything other than crappy. When I start feeling like an old married woman I'll let you know."
I hate the "so, how's married life" question too! It's like I'm meant to have up-ended my life just because I got married. I've been saying "Eh, the same really" and people usually drop it.
baby? house? moving to suburbs?
Put that on an endless loop and playback for the last 2 months. The answer is NO to all.
I dont know how to answer the "Hows married life?' question. I feel like people are expecting a change even though we lived together before we were married.
"When are you going to have a family?"
People just don't understand how much angst this question causes.
@maryjane: I'd respond to that, "what do you mean? I already do." Since when is a married couple not a family?
I feel bad because I've totally asked friends how it is to be married. I don't ask to be annoying...I ask because I care and I'm excited for them!
*sheepish grin*
@Mrs. DG: Some guy asked DH if he'd "knocked me up yet" on our honeymoon. Rude but we were all drinking and it was pretty funny.
I've been getting "how's married life?" and "when are you going to have babies?" ever since my wedding!!! I just smile and say "okay" or "maybe next year". I'm not sure what to say!
@Sunshine23: I hear you. I was married this weekend and back to work yesterday (I know, too early, but I'm super busy at work and my husband coaches basketball so we can't go anywhere until spring break (plus low on money and vacation time)) and I'm already getting the baby jokes! We aren't even close, still in twenties-barely, but I'm sooo afraid to take a sick day now!
:) i'm right there with you guys!!! i mean, seriously - do people think that "married life" is THAT much different than before? i mean c'mon - we lived together for 2 years before getting married! i always say "it's the same as it was before"!
Why is it like 2 seconds (literally!) after announcing our engagement, people were asking if we picked a date. Seriously - I called some family members and said "He just proposed!" and their very next question was "So when's the wedding?" HOW THE HELL SHOULD I KNOW? I JUST regained the ability to form full sentences, let alone pull out a calendar and compare it with everyone else's. Sheesh!
"Aren't you guys having babies yet? Or trying?" And when we say "No, we would like to get a dog first" they reply "Why no kids?" Holy cow, we have only been married for two months AND I am trying to finish up my PhD (which is enough pressure as it is).
Yep the whole "when are you going to have kids" question.
We don't want kids ever, and this starts a string of other questions or statements like "wait and see" "you'll change your mind" or "thats how I was" really? Because if "thats how you were" yet we are the same age & you already have two kids, yeah, that makes sense!
Our wedding is 3 days away, and I swear if I hear one more person say "looks like your going to have beautiful weather for your day" I am seriously going to scream!!!
Worst part is I know they are just trying to be nice, but I hear it 50 times a day!
I really hate "So when do you want to have kids?" Just because we want to get married doesn't mean it's so we can have kids. It's going to be at least 5 years, thanks. :P
@bunnyfoofoo: I completely agree! I'll admit - I totally did it to other people until I became engaged myself - then I realized how entirely stupid it is to ask someone when the wedding date is when they've been engaged for...hmm...less than a week? People would ask all of the time when we first were engaged and I would come right back with - we don't have a date yet. We're just enjoying our engagement of ...three days. :)
I don't mind the how's married life. I always tell them I love being married. We didn't live together before we married so it really is different. That combined with the fact that we moved across the country (and away from our family) makes it drastically different from before we were married.
We did, however, move close to DH's grandparents. His grandmother always asks "So when are you gonna start a family?". We always plan something to say ahead of time. One time it was "We already have one.", another time we told her a random date. She knows we are waiting till we are ready, but she insists on asking anyway, so we are pretty sarcastic about it.
People ask so....when are you having a baby?! HELLO! We have been married for 3 weeks....give me some time...lol!
I still get asked how married life is a year and a half after our wedding! FWIW, to those who say they feel bad for asking, its not so much the question that bothers me - so don't feel bad- it's the fact that people are ALWAYS asking that same question! We haven't gotten a ton of "When are you having babies?" because I'm in school but I know the minute I'm done it will hit. Speaking of, another annoying one for me is "How's school?" Because I have to explain stuff so many times... We were at a party the other night and I got asked that question about 15 times in 3 hours. The first 2-3 I explained how I'm almost done, working on my dissertation, etc etc. But by the 15th time, school was just "Good!" - I feel like I did the same thing with the Married Life question- first few times I elaborated, contemplated, compared it to non-married coupledom... but that 4th time or so, all bets were off! It was just "Great!"
Haha...my husband and I got asked that question ALL THE TIME. It was annoying because our first year was actually pretty hard, but it always felt like they wanted to hear something like "fantastic! Great! the best time of my life!" But I know they were just trying to make conversation :-)
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How's married life? I am going to scream. AHHHHHHHH
And other annoying questions that people ask you over and over either during your engagement or after you were married that absolutely drove you crazy?