Post # 1
My Mother had a blowout on me Sunday night, and not only pulled my sister from the wedding party, took my (family) dog out of the wedding too, and then said “not tomorrow, not next week I don’t want to hear about the wedding” “tell me day of when and where I need to be”
Mom was contributing financially. She in August when we began to plan told us her contribution and wrote 10 post-dated cheques for each month leading up to wedding.
I am not cashing them from here on in out of respect (is respect the word?) of her removing herself from wanting to be involved. The money part of it we can find ways to “make up”, but what bride doesn’t want to talk with her Mom about the wedding?
Honestly if I knew drama like this came from getting married (I had heard stories, but this is unreal) I wouldn’t be doing what I am doing. I am upset now, and gosh knows I hope the dust settles, but in reality Sunday night still happened and I am of the opinion (and Fiance who witnessed her show up at our door and do/say what she did) that I did nothing wrong enough to warrant what I’ve gotten back, and she of course thinks I am a horrible inconsiderate person. Regardless of who is right or wrong, has anyone had to deal with “losing” their mother’s support part way through the planning and things just didn’t get better?
*the part where I am wrong is 4/5 BM’s like their dresses. The 5th doesn’t (my sister) and because I won’t change all the dresses for one all of this has erupted.
Post # 3
If she had a blowout on sunday, she might have calmed down by now.
I think that she has no right to be upset over a dress that 4 girls like. But you can try to talk to her. Maybe she was just venting and vented a bit more than she wanted to. If she contrubuted financially, than I think that she really is intrested in your wedding.
What does your sister have to say about this?
Post # 4
Usually, there is something more going on. I would talk to your sister and see what is up in her life because often times I find it isn’t about the issue at the surface. It is about something else that probably doesn’t even involve you.
Honestly, give it a couple of weeks. My mom gets catty and blows up from time to time. It is her personality and I just avoid her for a couple of weeks and then everything is fine after that. Well, as fine as a limited relationship is. And maybe stop the wedding talk with her all together or keep it at a minimum to things she NEEDS to know about. If you want to chat weddings or need advice, come here. That is what we like to do.
Post # 5
It was more than a one-day vent, it was a week long thing and that was “the end” of it.
I am not allowed to speak to sister, and haven’t through all of this. There might be more going on, which….is fine….but to end up with the current outcome. Everything was amazing 2 weeks ago, I don’t talk with my Mom about wedding talk all.the.time, am careful of that and usually wait for her to ask -again, she’s contributing and wants to know where her money is going, she asks to see paper budget, I give, very forthcoming when asked. I don’t “chat” wedding and none of this is relevant.
I am asking who has dealt with this and looking to see if anyone is feeling as awful as I do right now.