Weddingbee boards

Ugh, I have to send out my invitations and I've been postponing because of one person (well, kinda 2 peope). 

Here's the thing... I hate hate hate my boss.  I've never been the type to use the word hate.  But she's a horrible, vile woman... when it comes to me, to everyone else in the office she's a very nice person.  But for 3 years now she's been making my life miserable.  Showing up hours late, throwing all her work on me, taking 3 hour lunches, drinking on the job (at least 3 x's a week).  I'm the punching bag.  She's best friends with my other co-worker so she's mean to me too.  I've complained about it before, here on weddingbee.  Our executive director doesn't understand.  In fact, if anything, he believes what she reports to him so I'm the bad employee.  He told me, indirectly but very clearly, that I have to invite these two horrible women to my wedding.  At the time I agreed.  I sent out the STD's, they got them, and they were being really nice to me around that time.  But they've since gone back to the regular, gang up on Jen phase and its unbearable. 

I DON'T WANT TO INVITE THEM!  But I have to now!  I know what you're thinking, they won't come right?  WRONG.  I overheard them discussing their plans to go.  I hope they've changed their minds.  Why on earth would they want to come?  How do I make sure they don't feel obligated to come?

Please tell me I'm not the only one who has people on their guest list that they don't want to be at their wedding!

give them a fake invite and send them to a park...

sorry to hear your in that situation.. what are the chances of them coming?? 100% 50/50??

Sorry- improptu meeting.  I'm gonna respond to everyone now! 

@lilyfaith- I would love to find a new job.  Its hard, duh, lol.  But I also don't want to start a new position and take 2 weeks off.  So after the wedding, I'm gonna try my hardest to find something.  I'm miserable. 

@vanilla frosting- I wish it was that easy.  I agree with you, this should be MY day.  But I just pray they don't come.  I am faithful that they won't.

@kiki82- he's always trying to make us like each other.  As if he were our guidance counselor in HS.  Its annoying.  And he has no idea how horrible it is.  Because I've never told him, since I'd automatically be ganged up on.

@MissHelen- I haven't written down the occurences, but you're right, I should.  I have taken pictures of her refrigerator though.  All that's in there is vodka and rotten food, yum. 

@bride colleen- I'm inviting 3 other people from the office.  I really can't get away with not inviting them since one of them is the executive director.  And I have to invite him because my FI has a great relationship with him (its a strange dynamic).

@ccranetobe- I would love to have the balls to do that.  I always envision doing mean things back to them.  So far, all I have done is tear up a returned lettered she sent to someone.  It was an important letter though!  :)

@mightsapphire- I'll be inviting 170 people, 5 of which are from the office.

@goldilocks1107- he's not aware of the situation.  He doesn't work in our office, we can go weeks without seeing him. 

@teaadntoast- that's a good idea, I'll send it in May.  I'm really gonna do that.  Hopefully they don't ask about it beforehand!

@tammyt12- wow, why has your sister been being so mean?  And your friend, that's easy to not invite.  I wouldn't have a problem booting a friend, especially for something like that!  But a boss and co-worker is a little different.

@hoshiku- I want a new job so badly!  It sucks because I love the work and there aren't a lot of programs like this.  But I'll keep looking.  The only thing that keeps me from felony assault is the fact that I do have my own office. 

@mrsmyphd- I remember that post!  I can't believe she wanted to come to the wedding.  Some people will go great lengths just to not miss anything. 

@evabostonterrier- I know, I am told I have the patience of a saint.  But really, I probably just have high blood pressure.  Because my blood boils but I just suck it all up, and smile.  I'm the fakest person I know at this place!  Lol.

@miss chapstick- How does your Mom deal with him when he's like that?  I'm hoping, if for some DUMB reason they come, I can just ignore them too.  In fact, I know I will, and it would give me a perverse pleasure to do so.   

@daydreamwanderer- another good idea.  I'm seriously going to seat them at the worst table.  Oh god, that excites me so much!

@troubled- office politics is a sick thing huh?  I wish I could just tell them to go F themselves.  I literally have had dreams doing just that!

@di5308- you're right.  I think they'd be even more horrible to me, that was my thinking.  And now, thanks to you all, I plan on seating them as far away from me as possible, at the crappiest table and I'll ignore them the entire night.  Except my boss is a dancer so I'll make sure everyone makes her feel uncomfortable on the dance floor- my peeps would do that for me!

@judya64- thanks for being pissed off for me!  Lol.  I'm pretty pissed too. 

@melissabegins- I have been looking for a new job.  Not as vigorously as I'd like to, just with my wedding being so close.  But I so desperately want a new one.  I'm also moving this summer.  I'm stuck in a lot of ways with this one!

What size company is this? 

Are other employees you like invited?

Do you have HR representatives?

Most companies (at least larger ones) these days either have hotlines or employees that ONLY deal with these kind of issues.

Your boss and your executive supervisor are WAY out of line. 1) Drinking on the job is NEVER OK. 2) Not showing up to work is NOT OK. 3) Belittling her employees is not OK. Unfortunately, piling work on you is kinda a gray area, but her treatment of you is NOT OK. For your executive to know about this, especially the drinking, and to in turn reprimand you is NOT OK. They should BOTH be punished or fired. 

@tammyt112- that does suck!  It hurts even more when you extended yourself to help her for her wedding not long ago.  I'm so sorry to hear that.

@melissabegins- good luck looking for a job.  I really hope find a great one :)

@dancy905- wouldn't it be awesome if we all lived in a world where we really could be that ballsy?  I freakin wish!

@troubled- by the middle of nowhere, you mean there's no job opportunities for you? 

@snmcdowell- theoretically I could do that.  I love the idea.  But I'm the worst liar.  And honestly, even if it was true, they wouldn't believe me and they'd make me pay for it here at work.

@cannotwait- you have a great point.  I would love to find something before the wedding.  I just can't wait to resign!  They're gonna be so screwed because I do all their work. 

@adidas.angel- that would be a great move.  But I'm brizzoke!  Lol. 

@klp2010- its a large company, but the program is small.  We're the only 3.  So if there was any complaints, they'd know it was coming from me.  Super screwed.  Oh, and the executive doesn't know about her behavior.  He works on a different floor, barely supervises.  We'll go weeks without seeing him.  But she has to report to him periodically.

@missyjyc- OMG, she's ridiculous!  I would seriously not invite her (haha, funny cause I'm obviously a push over so I'm probably lying).  I can't believe she had the nerve to say something like that to anyone, let alone you who was dating a white man.  Guess we're both stuck!

@ella1978- are you inviting other people from the office?  If you're not, you don't owe him an invite.  But, if you invite him and he doesn't want to show, you may get a good gift out of it!  That's so wrong, but its true :)

@lovespearls- thanks for the support :)

@beekiss2- thanks.  I have been collecting proof.  I can't be terminated so I'm not worried about it.  We're unionized.  And there have been no actions taken against be, in their eyes at least!