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I voted for "services". Most bridesmaids are already paying a lot to be a part of a wedding, so that is always a nice gesture!
When I was a maid of honor for a friend of mine, she paid for our hair and nails to be done. It was really great seeing that I had already spent so much money on the dress and shoes she wanted me to wear...which did not come cheap. I think that number 1 is most appreciative but perhaps not the most sentimental
I think I would rather have something not related to the wedding, unless I was being required to purchase a certain dress/shoes/jewelry for the wedding
I would really like to have some of the "services" paid for. I really think that is a great gift and takes some of the financial stress off of them if they are already paying for the dress, travel, hotel, etc.
I would also really like something that I could use again like comfy pj pants & tank or something like that.
I'd like #3 (something not related to the wedding) but I wouldn't like the bride requiring me to get my hair, make-up, and nails done if she wasn't going to pay for it. I think that in and of itself is not a gift-it's a gift to the bride. I wouldn't want the bride to pay for it but then not get me even a small gift of gratitude.
Sapphire - - I am not requiring them to get their hair/makeup/nails done but I have put it out there (b/c my makeup artist needed an estimate to how many people she'd be doing) BUT I do feel like if I pay for those services it is more a gift to me b/c it is something they wouldn't have been doing if it weren't for my wedding.
I DO think that having us all getting mani/pedis and/or hair/makeup done would be really fun and a good bonding experience and if I pay for it than maybe a few that woulnd't have been able to be involved could be...and that would be fun...
I wish I could do both, but hair/makeup alone is the cost of my BM gift budget ($100)!!!
I vote services, but I'd like a little something personal with it--it can be cheap, just something to show me the bride cares about me personally.
I'm getting them necklaces, a bracelet and earrings and a cute little clutch that has their favorite colors on them that they can double and wear to the wedding. I think they'll love it because I will...
I voted for services to be paid for. A friend of mine paid for $30.00 worth of hair/make-up and we paid the rest. She also gave us a small personalized gift. That is kinda the best of worlds. I know all of us girls really appreciated it when it came time to pay.
@Tonya: I COULD just pay for one service and get them a gift....now, that's an idea....
Thanks so much ladies...I really appreciate all of the comments!
I would really like the services paid for...it can get expensive and i think its a nice gesture...personalized? maybe not...but greatly appreciated...definately yes.
I say services because well...call me a jerk but most likely I would not use whatever gift is given (ex - personalized tote bags...so cute...but it would absolutely 100% just sit in my closet) because I am very picky about things that I get for myself...that even my mother has a really difficult time shopping for me. I'd rather have the bride invest money in a gift I can appreciate...I like a little pampering :)
I voted services paid for. To be honest..I can't even tell you what I got for gifts for being a bridesmaid. I think one got me a necklace..thanks, but I dont wear them, I dont like them and I have no idea what I did with it. For other, I have no idea what they got me-IF! they even got me stuff.
For me, I would much appreciate getting hair/make-up done bc I personally can not style my hair and I hardly wear make-up so getting it "professionally" done would be a treat. But again, that's just me.
If you're paying for stuff for the wedding, that's nice, but it's not really a gift. You should get them something else, IMO.
Personally, I would prefer the services. If am going to be in a ton of pictures, I want to look my best. I am not one of those girls who is good at doing my hair in any special way beyond work appropriate neat. It is fun to get pampered, and know that I will look nice in those pictures.
A personalized gift is fine, but I don't care if my initials are on something. If you go that route, I think an individual gift tailored for individual people, like you would get for a birthday, is so much better.
Services for sure. Most women are relatively reluctant to spend money on themselves for things like pedis and manis. I don't wear the typical jewelry/stuff that comes as a bridesamid gift. Most of those are mass-produced and kinda cheesy. Now it'd be different if you hand-picked something for each girls' personalities.
Case in point: i have a brown set of swarovski earrings/necklaces for one wedding. Do i ever wear them? No. For another wedding I got a pendant necklace with an S on it (for my last name). It also had a tiny heart pendant and a tiny pearl on the same one. I wear it a lot. In fact i'm wearing it right now. It's just a cool piece that i wear a lot and it was definitely inexpensive, but practical for post-wedding, too.
I would prefer #3 although I wouldn't turn down #1 either if that is what the bride decided on. But if you go with #1, try to include something personal for each attendant. Personalized has nothing to do with getting initials engraved since you're matching the gift to each person's interests. I absolutely would not want #2, despite being bombarded everywhere with the idea that that is the only "acceptable" option for a bridesmaid gift, aka jewelry and the like specifically for the wedding that is never worn again and doesn't fit anyone's individual style, simply because it ends up being wasted money and a dust collector. Everything except the flowers are the responsibility of the bridesmaid. While it's a nice gesture for the bride to cover expenses of hair and makeup and anything else, not every bride can afford that, nor are they are expected or required to pay for it. As far as the services go, unless the bride requires a certain look, in which case she would pay for everyone's expenses, those should be optional. If someone doesn't want a manicure or professional makeup, they should not be forced to participate in that.
I was a BM once, and the bride paid for my hair, and got me a nice scarf as well - kind of like @Tonya2010 said. That was nice.
I do not normally get my hair, nails, or makeup done, so having a bride pay for it, is a gift to me. If you pay for the mani/pedi you could do it the day before and have it be a spa day type. I think if you do the services as a gift, you should make sure to write a very thoughtful thank you note and maybe a picture of the two of you?
I picked the first option because it can be something you can do with your whole crew thats fun, relaxing, and a memory in itself. i wish I could have done this for my BMs but timing didnt work out right (scheduling, it was an OOT wedding for 90 percent of our guests.party) but it would have been my preference =)
I guess I didn't chose services because all of us always go to the hair salon anyway and are all VERY particular about our hair lol! if it was me I wouldn't let anyone else touch mine to be quite honest with you, getting a mani and pedi are okay I suppose but everyone gets them done on a regular basis but I guess I coud add in a mani and pedi and I think my mom wants to try for the hair thing, but I doubt if my cousin would go for that she loves her stylist and so does M's sister, my bestie might but I love her hair pulled back in a ponytail because it looks sooo chic and awesome on her and she could do it herself :D ... i dunno I guess my girls are different...
I'm going for paying for their hair and maybe a manicure, mostly because it will be a great way to bond together before the ceremony and relax (especially since one bridesmaid, my FSIL, doesn't really know the other girls, so it might be a nice way for them to get to know each other). That said, though, I might get them a small, inexpensive piece of jewelry that has nothing to do with the wedding just as a thank-you that has more to do with them than the wedding itself.
I'm really glad I posted this question, it's really given me some insight into "What women REALLY want" haha.
To clarify, option #3: personalized gift. I was not thinking something with initials or a monogram, I was thinking something unique for each bridesmaid --- something that matched their personalities.
I was originally leaning toward getting them all something from Tiffany's (just one of the less expensive but classic pieces like the Silver Ball earrings or Bean pendant necklace) that I don't intend to be worn at my wedding...I would most likely vary the piece based on their personalities. Thoughts on this? It is not totally personalized, as they would all be getting something from the same place....
I'm not sure how the jewelry fits their individual personalities, if that is what you are going for. If you want something individualized, think about their hobbies and interests. What type of things are they into? Camping, entertainment, cooking, etc? Those will have more meaning than a necklace that they may or may not even like.
Yeah, that was just my initial idea....which was not totally personalized!
Ugh, still torn! keep the insight coming :)
I've been a BM 10 times and I never wear the jewerly that is given to us to wear. The personalized gift I did get for one wedding is now dated and don't use it anymore. I did get services for one wedding and loved it! She hired someone to come in and do hair, nails and massage. We all were at her mother's house. The hair in one room, massage in another etc. Her aunts brought us food for brunch. So it was nice to get to spend the morning getting ready with each other.
I'm doing services but I got them some bath soaps and lotions to put in a gift bag with a card that says "enjoy the day with me being pampered" I'm also doing services because it is a destination wedding and the girls aren't going to know where to go to get hair/nails done.
I voted for something for the wedding. I think it's nice for a BM to not have to worry about having certain jewelry/shoes. I chose to get pearls for my BMs. I found some on sale so I'm not spending a fortune and it's something they can wear again.
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I'm having trouble deciding what type of gift to get my bridesmaids....I have 6 bridesmaids, so I can't spend an arm and a leg. Some of them are also in school, and I sort of feel guilty for the burden my wedding might be placing on them financially...so hard! But, I also like the idea of giving them a "gift" instead of buying them services....My question to you is: What gift would you prefer?
1. Services paid for (that they may/may not have to pay for themselves....) like mani/pedi, hairstyling, and/or makeup
2. A gift for the wedding, that may/may not be used again (i.e., jewelry to wear with BM dress, shoes, robes to get ready in, etc.)
3. A personalized gift that doesn't necessarily have anything to do with the wedding/wedding weekend.