Post # 1
I have anxiety issues. I’m a very..singular person. I don’t like being around people in general. I’m fine with going to the same bar on ladies night, every thrusday for the past three years. I know everyone and I feel safe. I’ll have a panic attack if I go some place else by myself.
I’ve had just the weirdest borderline panic attacks lately, I think mostly due to issues reguarding my ex roommate and the stress of finding out my father’s parents are actually alive and did not die ten years ago as I was lead to believe (apparently they are in a home) by my cunttastic aunt on my fathers side. (I never met my dad). But yeah weird panic attacks like, about my engagement ring not being like different enough, because it’s a solitaire and looks like every other girls but matches my cool very different style wedding band. I have no idea why I was so anxious about that. And then out of no where I was getting cold feet about SO and getting married and stuff…just silly things. Like oh he is younger then me and i always wanted an older man and blah blah….Even though SO is way more emotionally balanced and financially responsible then any of my ex’s who were in their early to late 30s.
And then all of a sudden “omg his family is going to hate me I’m not pretty enough or smart enough or good enough or whatever for their golden child”
He is a bit of a golden child =) Thats not a bad thing.
But basically I kept myself up all night thinking about the most pointless things.
And THEN SO wakes up. runs int the living room and starts tickleing me and giving me kisses and pinchin my butt and all silly stuff. He reminds me of a dog sort of, you know when you come home and the dog is OMG SO EXCITED TO SEE YOU! I get that every morning when he wakes up and every time he comes home. And out of nowhere he says…
“Oh by the way buttercup….I bought you the 2nd season of your fav anime (spice and wolf) and I know I was going to buy you a pretty dress for your sisters wedding, but I was thinking we get a less expensive dress, and if you have everything clean by the time I come home today…(damn him! Lol he is so mean! Bribery!) I’ll order you that vintage Coach bag you’ve been eyeing all month on etsy”
How the hell could I ever think he isn’t the most perfect person in the world? It’s not the coach bag or the dvds or anything….But that he even thought about something like that, and that he has such enthusiasm to see me even if I’m just sitting on the couch being weird. He’s so good to me. I am such a lucky person.
Post # 3
@HelleCat: I have the same anxiety issues!! I used to not be able to go any where that I wasn’t comfortable with. I call my SO my meds because when he’s with me my anxiety is alot less than it used to be!
Aww super sweet( but total bribery hahha) I wish my SO would do that after I clean the house and all haha.
Even tho we are waiting, we are soooo lucky to have them right!
Post # 4
So lucky. I really can’t imagine life without him.
Post # 5
@HelleCat: Sweet story! That made me smile.
Post # 6
@Sunfire: Good, I’m still smiling!
Post # 7
daaaawwwww! Thats sweet! I have anxiety issues too… Mine are a little different i suffer from IBS and a TON of food allergies so even if i dont feel like i have to go, i will sometimes break down and have a panic attack when we are driving or traveling or someplace i have never been before because i dont know where the washroom is and i am terrified of having an ‘accident’ in public. My life revolves around washrooms it seems. xoxo hugs to you!
Post # 8
@MrsHoneyC: I have the exact same issue! I started getting digestive issues like 2 years ago, which turned into panic attacks around getting sick. Now they come on sometimes at restaurants, on public transportation, at work, and I start thinking… how can I get to the bathroom in time to not embarrass myself (usually I’m not even sick, I’m like pre-emptively worrying myself, and making myself sick from anxiety!). SO has been so supportive, and has to deal with a girlfriend with all these gross GI issues. But THAT also makes me anxious, like — why would he want to marry a girl with IBS and anxiety who sometimes freaks out and has to go home and can’t stop shaking. Urgh. I feel you ladies. Anxiety is the worst, and I think this whole ‘waiting’ phase has brought it out even more.
Post # 9
Awe he sounds like such a sweetie! but I hear you, on the panic attacks, ive suffered off and on from severe panic attacks since I was 10 or 12….due to extreme circumstances….but honestly my therapist helped me alot and luckily i dont need medication, and i have not had a panic attack in about 4 years…so ive been doing really good, i think what helps is my career because ive had to lean about managine severe stress, and getting better day by day thanks to my SO, and therapy in dealing with depression, but you sound like a little bit older version of me! i hate new bars, and places to go, i like my usual for my social life, but im a bit off, outside of work i know i lack confidence, but at work i feel incontrol of most of the time,and feel more confident….im sorry you are dealing with anxiety as well, i know how much family drama can send anxiety into a tail spin…so good luck to you! maybe we should start an anxiety section on the bee….lol! : )
Post # 10
@kansas_nurse: omg we o need an anxiety section..