- 3 years ago
- Wedding: April 2013
I’m a board member for an art/community organization. I love it and I love organizing events. However, as you would see from a post I made a few days ago, I’m beginning to wonder if that’s enough.
First, the kids’ art exhibit I was chairing was “canceled” without my knowledge, consent, anything. Well, as it turns out, the exhibit was never formally canceled. In fact, the director of the board wanted to see my progress on its planning set-up – he had no intention of canceling it. A fellow board member (and major bully who has something against me for some reason) just told me my exhibit was canceled. So, I sent her a not-so-nice email and told a friend/board member (and the Best Man at my wedding), to which he said if my event wasn’t happening, he’d pull everything he did for his event (ours are to occur simultaneously). This wouldn’t be a big deal, but his event has been a community staple for over thirty years and draws the biggest crowd we get all year. (He’s only chaired it for the past three years and always tries to take a new direction, creatively). This is why it would have been a huge blow to the rest of the board to pull creative rights and leave them scrambling to plan the entire event in three weeks or not have it for the first time in thirty years.
In response, the bully forwarded the email I sent to her to the director. (Apparently trying to get me in trouble?) I will admit that email wasn’t my finest moment, but I wasn’t about to let someone walk all over me. Well, long story short, my event is definitely happening. She can go fly a kite.
Well, I thought we had everything ironed out… but no. I get a call that we’re short actors for my friend’s event (the one that will occur with my exhibit). They beg me to take a role. What do I do? I agree to it under the conditions I can find someone to manage my exhibit, I can choose which I story I get, and I only do it two of the four nights. They say okay and give me Saturdays, though I say Fridays will be better.
On the first Saturday, I have to do an order of fifty cupcakes and a cake for a party (one of my businesses is a home-based bakery) before somehow managing to fill-in for a friend’s event while missing my own. I barely have time for any of this and I’m WAAAAYYYY in over my head already. Not to mention I have to miss the dress rehearsal because I have a wedding to go to.
I recently got a new job and my husband and I are starting two new businesses, in addition to looking into working on getting our adoption licensure and working on buying a house. Plus, I have jury duty and baby-sitting my sister while my mom is out of town.
DH said I should just worry about my own event and not fill-in for acting because it’s ‘not your problem.’ The thing is, it kind of is… If one event tanks/doesn’t happen, the entire board looks bad, not just the chairperson.
So, I’m seriously considering stepping down after the next event. I love being on the board, but I’m wondering if it’s worth it. On one hand, I think it would free up some time and I would get less migraines, but I feel like I’d be “letting” the bully win by leaving. I’m also not sure I want to be a part of something where you can treat your fellow members like shit and no one does anything about. The thing is, if I do leave and ever wanted to come back, I’m not sure I could. (There’s also a good chance I’d make director after the current one retires. If I leave, there’s a good chance that awful woman will get it and run the organization into the ground).
What should I do?
What do you think… Stay or step down? Thoughts or opinions? TIA.