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Im Irritated, I feel like were put on the back burner...

posted 2 years ago in Parties
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    1.
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    761 posts
    Busy bee
    Osakagrl    May 8th 2010   Sacramento , CA

    Hey Everyone,

    So I am quite irritated at the moment. Hoping I can vent and maybe even someone to tell me im making a bigger deal of this then it is ;)

    Background:

    My Boy and I legally got married last year for immigration reasons. his visa was expiring, etc etc. anyways we still really wanted a ceremony for our family and friends. so we are having our wedding in may.

    Our church KNOWS that we got married as of last year but are having this ceremony in may. it is a custom of our church, if you get married...they hold a wedding shower for you. Well they came to us stating they wanted to throw one for us in feburary. never happened, they said lets do it in march thats so much better! great! didnt happen. then they rescheduled it to April, 1st sunday of april....ISNT HAPPENING! They know pushed it off SO FAR that they want to throw us a shower a WEEK before our ceremony! I dont see any point in this at all. its just too close.

    ALSO, they ask us, what kind of cake would you like? hmmm we love strawberry! Well you get green tea cake...wtf!? Why did you even ask then?

    AND THEN we get a phone call from the church and they asked us to make a 30 questions QUIZ on us for everyone to play at the shower...oh yeah and by the way, can you buy a prize for the person who knows the most answers? Im so IRRITATED I DONT want to plan my own shower, im already trying to plan this wedding.

    I just feel like they have put us on the back burner because we "legally" married last year. Like "OH well, they are TECHNICALLY married, so we dont have to try as hard."

     

    END RANT

     
    2.
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    Buzzing bee
    MissHelen    November 20, 2010   California

    I'm so sorry ((HUGS))

    Is there someone you can talk to to voice your concerns? Because they're certainly valid. Barring that, do you have a wedding party and if so, is there someone in the wedding party that can take the reins?

     
    3.
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    2,655 posts
    Sugar bee
    Tanya123      

    Wow, so your church actually plans showers for people?  That's kind of nice (in general) but also a lot of work.  You think that it's because you're already married.  I guess I can't comment on that.  It might be, might not.  Perhaps they're flaky?  Maybe they do this type of thing to everyone?  Or maybe it's a bad year or time of year for them?

    I think if they are going to cause you this much trouble you should probably just tell them "thanks but no thanks" to the shower.  Just see if you can get someone else to throw a shower.

    Sorry.  Good luck.

     
    4.
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    Bee Keeper
    2PeasinaPod       Philadelphia

    I'm so sorry you're going through this! I would have probably said, "thanks but no thanks" to the shower at this point. It sounds as if they are taking advantage of the fact that you are already married. Though it's really sweet that they want to throw you a shower, it's now become a burden on you, and you have every right to let them know that you're just not interested in it anymore.

     
    5.
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    Busy bee
    Osakagrl    May 8th 2010   Sacramento , CA

    And see thats the thing, thats why i am so ANGRY! Is because i was sincerely looking forward to this shower SO MUCH! They got me all excited and they do this to us. = =;;

    I WANTED to tell them thank you so much but no thanks but my husband says we are obligated to let them throw it and must attend. he is a very non confrontational and he likes to make everyone happy before himself therefore he couldnt say no.

    I told him not to bother making a quiz or buying a prize but he insists he has to.

     

     
    6.
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    3,340 posts
    Sugar bee
    Melissabegins    December 12, 2009  

    ouch.. i would just not answer their questions or calls regarding the shower in particular. It's not very nice to cancel on you, what, 4 times?  Grr

     
    7.
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    54 posts
    Worker bee
    Smurfin    May 21, 2010   TX

    By this point I personally wouldn't even want their party anymore. I'm sorry you have to deal with all that. :(

     

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