I'm not good enough

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
147 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

A loaded question.

Good enough… for what?

If a man is telling you that you are not good enough for him… he sounds like he is abusive and a liar.

No one has the right to say that.

… Could you please tell us more?

Post # 5
Member
7997 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

No guy is worth all this heartache.

Post # 6
Member
2355 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

It’s not you. You’re not defective. If a man isn’t interested, it doesn’t mean you are flawed in some way. It could be that you are investing too much emotion and energy into someone who would realistically never be good for you. If you’re not right for them, then they are definitely not right for you.

 

Post # 7
Member
147 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@Relat:  The first paragraph seems to indicate that you are friends… you value his friendship.. and have been his friend for 6 years.

However, your second paragraph seems to indicate you are more than friends… you sound more involved in his life… or perhaps you want to be… and you say that you love him and are thinking of ‘ending it with him’. Could you please clarify which it is?

ETA: sorry I think I posted this to early. I just read that you want to get married.

It does not sound like an equal relationship. You seem to be putting in much more effort. That is a a RED FLAG.

His lack of participation in this relationship is making you question your self worth. RED FLAG.

But you sound smart. You’ve figured out that you want to end this – but you still love him.

And that is ok! Of course you can’t just ‘turn off’ loving someone.

Don’t stay in a relationship were things are not equal.

Post # 8
Member
433 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

You should only be with a man who makes you feel not only good enough, but more than good enough, every single day.

Post # 11
Member
1877 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

Have you ever told this guy how you feel? You say he doesn’t share the same feelings as you, but you cant expect him to if he doesn’t know how you feel. Guys aren’t mind readers. 

Post # 12
Member
7997 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

@Relat:  You erase your feelings a day at a time. You realize you DO deserve better, and you get through it. Honestly, for me, just realizing I deserved better was the big thing. I was in the vicious going back to him cycle for so long that once I had that realization, everything was downhill from there. Sure, you’ll get lonely… but lonely is better than being with a guy who doesn’t deserve you.

Post # 14
Member
1877 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

@Relat:  Yeah, that does make it seem pretty clear. Cut him out of your life entirely. Things like moving on are much easier when it’s done cold turkey. 

Post # 15
Member
9949 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Relat:  If you’re not dating, then you need to focus on finding someone else to date.  That will at least take your mind off of him, and you’ll see the people who are out there!  How old are you?

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