"I'm not ready to be a grandparent yet"

posted 2 years ago in Babies
Post # 2
11668 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

anonybee0810:  my mom used to say this to my sister before she got pregnant and probably during as well. I think it was half serious half joking. It annoyed my sister but nothing to get too upset over. My mom got over it real quick and loves being a grandma! While having a baby isn’t necessarily all about the grandparents and their feelings, becoming a grandparent is a big life change too so I think those feelings are valid. Thy just are best not expressed to the people who are making them grandparents!

Post # 4
3769 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 1999

My MIL pulled this and actually quit talking to us and had very little to do with my daughter for the first couple of years of her life (and is still pretty limited in our family to this day). But my MIL has other issues just generally as a person, I think most people get other this very quickly once the baby is one its way or arrives:)

Post # 5
10904 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

I was very interested in opening this thread, because I wasn’t sure if someone else was in a similar situation to mine.

I married quite late in life and still have not conceived, but my DH has four children, two of whom are now married, and one has a child.  As a result, I become a grandmother before — and possibly instead of — becoming a mom, and I have to say how much I love being a grandparent.  Whereas I would be considered to be an old “new” mom at my age, I have the opportunity to be a fairly young grandparent.

I’m saying all of this to make the point that even parents who don’t think they’re ready to become grandparents likely will fall head-over-heels in love with their grandbabies once those precious little blessings arrive! 🙂

Post # 6
715 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Me!  My MIL would say things like this constantly and whenever we brought up starting a family she would jump in to add how “that’s not for a long long time though!”.  She had no clue we were going to TTC right after our wedding. When we told her I was pregnant (I was about 10 weeks along) she was very supportive but she was initially shocked and made a few comments about how “accidents happen” (because the only way she could swallow the fact that I was pregnant was if it was by accident!).  I tried my best to ignore her comments but it made me so upset.  I wanted to say something to her on several occasions but DH just wanted to keep the peace so we let her go on believing whatever she wanted.  

Sadly I miscarried that pregnancy but got pregnant again quickly after and I think that made her realize that we were actually getting pregnant on purpose… With this pregnancy, she’s fully embraced the grandma roll since day 1: refers to herself as Nonna, constantly talking about “her baby”, shopping for baby things.  Its been a huge relief to have her be so excited for our baby on the way (25 weeks along now). 

Post # 7
195 posts
Blushing bee

Unless a) It’s a complete joke and they’re making fun of the fact that they don’t want to feel that ‘old’ or b) the parent of the grandchild is a teenager, that’s rude and not a comment one should ever be making.

Post # 8
7290 posts
Busy Beekeeper

Brielle:  I thnk that is a very good point. Becoming a grandparent is a milestone life event and I think it is fair for someone to say they are not ready for it. It doesn’t mean they won’t get ready or be happy just that it probably wasn’t something they expected or thought about just yet.



Post # 9
272 posts
Helper bee

I don’t think I would react to it badly or anything. It would be my baby, whether you are ready to be a grandparent or not, is not meant for me to take into calculations. (if any)

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