(Closed) I’m not super into the idea of breastfeeding.

posted 8 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
1883 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I am right there with you. I do not want to breastfeed at all. I’m not saying I won’t change my mind, but after watching what my sister went through-cracked and bleeding nipples, horrible pain when pumping, NO THANK YOU.

Post # 4
13099 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

Although I don’t have children yet, I too am not so convinced on the idea of breast-feeding.  I may try it with my first but if it doesn’t click or I just don’t care for it, I will have no problem switching to formula and never looking back.

My brother, sister, and I were all formula fed and we’ve all turned out great!  You hear all the information about how breast-feeding is really good for the baby’s immune system – well none of the three of us were EVER sick growing up (basically just went to the doctor for vacinations and sports physicals) nor do we tend to get sick now.  You hear about breast-feeding helping with the bond between mother and baby, but like you said, what about the bond between dad and baby?  And there’s much more you can do to bond with your baby than feed them.

I have nothing against those who choose to breast-feed but I don’t think it is the best option for all people/families.  I DO dislike when those who choose to breast-feed go all “high and mighty” on those who don’t (I know not all mothers do this but there certainly are a decent number who do).  Neither option for feeding your baby is bad – they’re just different.  So no worries OP, you certainly aren’t the only one!

Post # 5
2634 posts
Sugar bee

So don’t do it.  That’s the grand thing about having your own kids – you get to make all the decisions!

Just be prepared to change your mind though, being flexible goes hand in hand with having children.

Post # 6
1995 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I don’t see any problem with it.  It’s your life and your baby, if you don’t want to then don’t feel guilty.  I don’t have kids so have no clue but I always wondered what happens when the milk starts to come if you don’t use it.  Is it a use it or loose it type deal?  I wonder how long it takes to go away.

Post # 7
1638 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I have no kids but I can’t say I’m 100% on board w/breastfeeding when we have kids. I mean I give the women that do it SO much credit but I’ve seen nipples of women that breastfeed and in all honesty, I’m a wimp. I would cry more than the baby if my nipples were looking that like and sore/cracked all the time. I think it’s a personal decision for every woman that she needs to make herself and I don’t think anyone on WB is going to yell at you or give you a hard time if it isn’t for you!

Post # 8
1645 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I don’t think that any woman should be judged for her decision to breastfeed or not. I also believe that a happy mom is better than a frustrated, impatient one who is trying to do something that’s just not working for her.

Personally I believe that breastfeeding, at least initially, is very beneficial to the baby and their immune system. The colostrum has very important antibodies that really do help out baby in those early months and beyond. That being said, breastfeeding hasn’t always been prefered and people grew up just fine.

However, there are people out there who really don’t have a lot of trouble breastfeeding. (see here for one example.) You can share feeding with your husband by pumping. It is still a lot of work and time, and isn’t for everyone. It really is a difficult issue and a very personal decision, but (being pro-boob juice) I’d just try and get as much information as you can before you make your decision. Some of the fears/concerns you have might not be as big of an issue as you think they will be, as you get closer or once you have your baby.

If you decide not to breastfeed, I would take a very matter of fact stance with people. I’d simply say that I’m making the best decision for my family. If people start to offer opinions on your decision, I’d tell them that you are happy they can make that decision for themselves and their family, and that you can make the decision for your family.

I tend to be on the snarky side when I feel judged, so I’d take that approach, but it’s not for everyone.

Post # 9
1883 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

One lady who responded to the article wrote <<I feel that women’s unique ability to care and nurture their children elevates them and gives them a place of high value both in the family and in society>>

LOL! Pretentious much?  I think these types of people are who the OP is talkin about.

Post # 10
158 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

Then just dont do it….If you feel guilty about it, its only because you arent sure of your internal decision.


And of course there are babies who drink fomrula who turn out to be just fine…..If formula was a direct cause of problems and it could be PROOVEn beyond a shadow of a doubt then it would not be available.

I say to you what i say to all moms. You have your choice as to how you should feed your baby.


However, I caution against using that article for support becuase simply put, most of the things they say are “good” for us when you take a look at the evidence you would be sorely disappointed.

Lots of things we say “exist” when you look at the statistics, correlation, validity and reliability THERE IS NONE! ANd this can be applied to any and almost everything. (Mental Illness, medicine, foods that are “safe” and the list goes on)

What i will say is that before we INVINTED formula, babies had breastmilk and moms made a way to make do.

With that being said, above all else, i SUPPORT a mom’s right to choice. SO do what YOU think is best for YOU and YOUR baby…and dont look to the media OR science for help.

Post # 11
4123 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Personally, while I don’t like the “idea” of breastfeeding, I like it better than “wasting” money (and a LOT of it!) on formula. I also don’t like the idea of starting my future kid on processed human created foods so early. (But I’ve also already looked into making my own baby food one day). I also like the idea of burning calories 😉

Maybe in “mommy circles” it’s more prevalent or different, however, I would never look down on someone or question why they didn’t. Heck, I don’t WANT to know! lol

Post # 12
447 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

I wasn’t into the idea of breastfeeding either. However, I decided to try it just to see if it would work for me. Personally, I hated it and after a few weeks went to only bottle feeding. Honestly, it just wasn’t for me. It wasn’t a bonding experience for me, and, personally, it was just more frustrating than it was worth. I’m much happier now that I’m not breastfeeding. I had the same idea as you about wanting my husband to bond as well. 

You don’t have to justify your decision to anybody but yourself. It’s possible that you won’t get any comments. Honestly, I haven’t gotten any at all. If you do though, just say that it is a personal decision and leave it at that. They don’t need to know details.

Post # 13
7082 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2009

Ultimately, you have to find what works best for you!  I hope nobody rips you to shreds, because this is a very personal decision.

Having said that, there is a preponderance of medical evidence that supports breastfeeding in the literature.

Here are some lovely excerpts that kept me going…

If you nurse your baby for the first few days after birth, he will get a healthy dose of colostrum.  Its main function is to protect the newborn from infection by coating the baby’s intestinal tract and acting as a barrier to prevent the invasion of harmful bacteria. It protects your baby from illnesses that you have been exposed to, as well as illnesses that he may be exposed to.  So if you breastfeed for a few days, you are doing your baby a great service!

Sometime between the second and fifth day after your baby is born, your milk will change from colostrum to transitional milk, which is thinner and more plentiful. This milk also contains important antibodies.  The protein in breast milk is much easier to digest that the protein in cow’s milk or formula, making your baby less likely to suffer from digestive problems such as gassiness, rashes, and colic. 

Breastfeeding during these early days is helpful for you as well as your baby. Breastfeeding helps you develop a special closeness as you get to know this special little person who has entered your life, and also helps your body recover from childbirth more quickly by releasing hormones that contract your uterus and reduce post-partum bleeding.  So if you breastfeed for a couple of weeks, you are doing you and your baby a great service!

If you nurse your baby for 4-6 weeks, you will be helping to ease his transition through the most vulnerable part of his infancy. Babies who are breastfed have lower rates of many illnesses, including digestive and respiratory problems, pneumonia and meningitis, and SIDS.  So, if you make it 4-6 weeks, you’ve really given a great start for your baby!

If you nurse for 3-4 months, your baby will be much less likely to develop ear infections. Studies have found that babies who were exclusively breastfed for at least four months had half as many ear infections as formula fed babies. 

Nursing can help you lose the extra weight you put on during pregnancy. Mothers who breastfed lose more weight by the time their babies are 3-6 months old that formula-feeding mothers who consumed fewer calories, because breast milk production mobilizes the fat you stored during pregnancy.  Think about how nice that would be for you and your baby!

If you nurse for 6 months, your baby will be much less likely to have problems with allergies, since at around that time, your baby’s intestinal tract begins to produce antibodies which coat his intestines and protect him from foreign proteins and allergens. 

Most mothers who exclusively breastfeed for six months will not have a period during that time, and rarely ovulate.  Helps moms build up needed iron stores and prepare for future pregnancy.  Admirable goal 🙂

If you nurse for 9 months, you will be helping him through one of the most important developmental periods of his young life. Babies between 6 and 9 months go through so many  changes – sitting up, teething, starting solids, crawling, pulling up, and more.

Lots of research points to the beneficial effects of breast milk on a baby’s intellectual development. Breastfed babies score an average of 8 points higher on IQ tests than formula-fed babies, and this seems to hold true even when things like parent’s educational and socio-economic backgrounds are factored in.  So making it 9 months is great for your baby!

f you nurse for a year, your baby will receive health benefits that last a lifetime. Long-term nursing protects against ulcerative colitis, diabetes, asthma, Crohn’s disease, obesity, and high cholesterol in adulthood. Babies who are breastfed for a year or more are less likely to need speech therapy or braces later in life.

All of this is evidence based, but the take home message is that if you even breastfeed for 3 days you are providing a benefit to your baby 🙂  And if you can’t do it, you can’t do it, but you’ll certainly make the decision based on what’s best for you, your baby and your family!

ETA I read the Atlantic article.  It was enjoyable, but most of the evidence she cites is quite old..  I think the most recent was from 2005… there’s a reason for that.  Because newer studies are having larger effect sizes and better design.  Plus the cumulutive weight of consistent outcomes points to the findings being a real effect:)

Post # 14
22 posts
  • Wedding: December 2012

I F*ing hated Boyfriend or Best Friend when I did it.

hated it with a burning passion.

I hated being *so* relied upon.

But I did it because I was less keen on the idea of formula, although I did eventually make the switch @ 7months because I just could not take the gnashing gums of a teething 7month old anymore.


Don’t feel guilty about it, it’s your life & your choice ultimately.

Post # 15
1288 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010 - Indiana Memorial Union

Think the social effect is pretty imporant — you have to sacrifice a lot of time in order to be able to breastfeed longterm. Many, many, many women do not have the luxury of stepping away from work multiple times a day or staying home. Time is worth more than formula costs to those women.

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