- 5 years ago
- Wedding: June 2012
I’m filing this under “pregnancy” but I’m sure all the people with weddings coming up in a few months can also relate, at least to the first part. Allow me to vent a little, and then feel free to add your vents to the pile!
I am due in just under two months. Yay! But now, like in the last week or so for whatever reason, people at work have started in on the “wow you’re still pregnant? Have that kid already!” If it’s not that, it’s them constantly assuming that I must be struggling, and thus saying things like “wow you must be having a hard time in this heat!” or “I bet you can’t wait to get that sucker out so you can [insert normal activity that I am not having any trouble doing] again!”
The first type really annoys me simply because I can’t imagine listening to that shit every single day for the next sixty days. If it happened once or twice, fine. But when every day someone feels the need to demand to know why I’m still pregnant (uhh, because if the baby were born now she’d be in the NICU for many weeks and would probably have health problems for life … ? is that a good enough reason?!), it starts to grate on me.
And the second type just makes me naturally very defensive. I have been a loud proponent of the “I’M PREGNANT NOT DISABLED” school of thought, and so it really grinds my gears to think that everyone in this office is looking on me with pity like I’m suffering some great and terrible trial every single day simply by having to be at work. How am I doing in this heat? Probably better than you, fatass. Am I excited to get this baby out? She really isn’t bothering me that much, actually, so she can stay a while longer. Like, 8 more weeks would be good.
I kind of get this attitude like “f*** you guys; I hiked 7 miles this weekend and 10 miles each of the two weekends before that. I work out (gently) five days a week. I’m in better shape than your old, lazy, fat ass, pregnant or not.” Of course I don’t SAY anything like that, but that’s where my brain turns and so I have trouble responding graciously. Instead, I end up smiling and saying (more than a little coldly) something like “I’m actually doing just fine and have no complaints whatsoever. Being pregnant isn’t really that hard.” I plan to keep saying that right up until the end, even if I AM suffering, simply because I don’t want to give my coworkers the satisfaction of seeing it.
I know they’re just trying to be nice and make conversation, but I’m f***ing tough, and tough people don’t appreciate being pitied. Especially when there’s nothing to pity — I am thrilled to be pregnant and am blown away by what my body has been capable of. I feel better and stronger and more capable than I ever have. So stop clicking your tongue and patting me on the shoulder. I punch you.
And nobody appreciates being asked the same question every day for months straight. Cripes.
Anyone else like to join this little vent? Or have any good tips for dealing with these people and their inane questions/comments without resorting to my usual coldness? I don’t want to act like a bitch, but DAMMIT I FEEL LIKE ONE.