- Blog
- Bios
- Boards
- Classifieds
- DIY
- Gallery
- Vendor Reviews
- Shop Weddingbee
Weddingbee boards
This isn't a post to entice the drama llama, I'm just venting.
I'm f'ing sick of this shit. Do you know how depressing it is to sign in and the first thing you see is someone saying that just because of someones weight, they're not good enough. As a women who normally falls into the categories that are considered "sub par", it's infuriating. I'm sure everyone will scurry to the boards to see what thread I'm talking about and you'll find it. That's not the only one though. In the last few weeks there have been multiple and it's got to stop. We all have just as much right to be here but we all also have the right to be respected. To continuously read that I'm not good enough is heartbreaking. I know that it's not "ME" that's being referred to in those threads but it's women like me. Women who have struggled with their weight their whole lives and who would love to be thin but just can't.
When did it become okay to be so disrespectful to people you dont even know?! Do you think that everyone on this site is a perfect size 8? Because they're not. Again, I know that you're all referring to specific people in your lives but when you classify them as "fat" or "300-350 lbs (but who knows)" then you're referring to a whole slew of people who fall into those categories. Why should we have to read thread after thread that demeans us? The posters who are responsible for these threads obviously have some insecurities of their own that they need to work out but it shouldn't be at the expense of the innocent.
Get over yourselves. You're not all that either.
I think this totally goes both ways, there have been some pretty nasty posts about girls who are skinny and not "real women" and a whole bunch of BS too. I think all sides need to realize we are all different and if someone else's weight (both over and under) bothers you that much you should examin yourself to see why you feel the need to so harshly judge someone else for something so insignificant.
I am chubby and proud of it. I've seen alot of bashing here in general, too skinny, too fat, too this too that. Come on... I wish I could like your post as well. Stop bashing.
@chasesgirl: While I agree with you, the difference is that any thread that even slightly talks down on skinny ladies is quickly edited and and poster is often warned or even banned. I've seen numerous "fat-bashing" threads recently and the original post goes unedited while people commenting on the OP have been edited. It doesn't seem fair. Both are insulting and both types of bashing (or any kind of bashing for that matter) should be treated equally.
@chasesgirl: There have been plenty of threads about skinny bashing too, but I believe this was posted in response to the most recent weight thread, about bridesmaids who are overweight being unacceptable, either because their dresses don't fit the uniform look, or they might mess up the pictures. This particular topic of overweight bridesmaids seems to be one that is trending over and over on here and people are sick of it.
@KatyElle: I Agree completely.. :/ It's such a shame, becuase all of the time I have been following WB, the rapid downfall of the quality of the threads are just .. shocking.
Specially the fat bridesmaid post. :(
@UpstateCait: I couldn't agree with you more. It's pathetic & sad!
Anyone else tired of the general nastiness around here lately? Or the troll posts?
I totally agree. Why is it okay to bash "fat" women, but the "skinny bitch" thread ended in a giant uproar? Wtf.
@Storm0075: I am, count me in! I don't post alot, but I do read alot of the posts. And it's just annoying at points.. :/
@UpstateCait:I <3 YOU. This really needed to be said.
I'm really sad WB has so much weight bashing now (didn't seem to before). I know we have a whole section of plus sized brides, and a whole bunch of people with a history of eating disorders, who may or may have been a variety of sizes themselves, or who may have a body dismorphism and think these posts are directed at them.
Thank you for flagging those posts and calling out those posters. Needed to be done.
@cbee: I didn't really realize this was going on, either. I think the original thread that OP is referring to was already taken down by the time I logged on today. I feel like I should have been aware of this because I too fall into the category of 300-350 pounds (but who knows). Hm. Maybe I should pay attention more.
@Storm0075: YES! THAT I am tired of. There are some posters that are so freakin' rude and snarky and no one ever seems to care.
Here here.. thank you for this thread. As I said in the other thread, people come in all shapes and sizes. Why bash ?
@CarolinaCola: there is a new one. A mod saw it, edidted a post that was not by the OP, and left the thread up. It's still there. I'm pretty sure I saw another one last night too that was already closed.
@Mrs Grape: I agree! that is the first thing that I thought of too!
and OP, I wish WeddingBee had a "like button". I couldn't agree more.
@Luckygal5571: Yeah, I saw the new one and thought it was completely ridiculous. When I first saw the name, I assumed it was another bee feeling like SHE was the "fat bridesmaid," because silly me I thought we were better than that to bring such negativity to the bee. Guess not :/
And now we have someone making a brand new sn just to tell me and other plus size ladies to go to the gym. Looks like it will never end...
@UpstateCait: and the Troll bee was bashing a waiting bee as well. Where are all the troll bees coming from?
Not gonna let it bother me since that's what they want. It's easy to hide behind a fake name but this person is obviously too stupid to realize that the mods can and will figure out who they are. It's just sad that people are so cruel. I'm sure this person is just a sad individual who has no-one to love her. I mean seriously... who would?
this is all making me really sad. what the heck is going on??! judging anyone by their weight is just wrong and so against the spirit of this site :(
@UpstateCait: That's not exactly helpful either. The most adult thing to do is to ignore people who try to bait you (or anyone else) and go on with your day. Can we talk about feather fascinators now?
@Caizn: Seriously, I don't need anyone telling me that my VERY PG post wasn't helpful after I was repeatedly called fat and told to go to the gym. Trust me, this is me taking the high road. I could have tore that... person apart but I chose to remain somewhat civilized.
@UpstateCait: "I'm sure this person is just a sad individual who has no-one to love her. I mean seriously... who would?"
Is taking the high road? Don't get me wrong, I agree with everyone these posts are getting out of hand and should be deleted. I could stand to lose 100lbs, but if people are going to post stupid things, its better to flag them, ignore them, and get on with my life. Is it really worth getting mad over? I know I have higher priorities than that.
@Caizn: THat's fine, but you weren't the one being attacked. If you feel that caitmarie handled it so poorly that you should call her out on it, maybe you should flag and move on, yeah?
ETA: i hope you don't feel that I'm trying to speak for you, OP, I just wanted to defend you because you handled that troll situation so much better than I would have.
@Caizn: Not the most mature thing I've ever said but I don't take it back. Okay, so maybe I took the middle road, lol. Nevertheless, it seems that the "problem" is gone for now so I'm over it... until it comes back. :)
Agreed. It's ridiculous. My posts have drastically slowed down because so many of them are "I'll just keep my mouth shut on this one" types of topics. It's insane. Oh, and btw I <3 you. ;)
Thank you for posting this. There is no reason for any judging about weight, race, or body type.
@UpstateCait: :) I'm glad we agree.
@JenniBride: My "stereotype" was being bashed, and all I was doing was suggesting a way to deal with it.
@AmeliaBedelia: My posts have drastically slowed down because so many of them are "I'll just keep my mouth shut on this one" types of topics.
Same here. But the upside of this is that it's done wonders for my self-control!
As you predicted, I did skurry over to the boards to see what you were talking about.... and I'm commenting on THIS thread, rather than that one, because if I commented over there, it wouldn't be very nice.
I 100% agree with this thread. As someone who has always struggled with weight, compulsive eating habits, and my self image, I can honestly say that I would never, EVER judge a person based on how much they weigh, because I would hate to be judged that way myself.
In fact, some of the most beautiful people I know (inside and out) are 200+ lbs.
People who post threads like that.... they're just ugly hearted people spewing ugly sentiments, because they're not happy enough with their own lives to understand and accept all the beauty the world has to offer.
What? I thought you had to be a size zero to write on Weddingbee?!
Just kidding. Trying to add a bit of light humor. :)
But seriously, I think this trend is sadly indicative of our beliefs about the female body as a culture. I hate to bring up Twilight, but I seriously heard a girl say that Bella's body looked hot even though she was supposed to be sick towards the end of the film. No one looks like that naturally without starving herself; after all, Bella is supposed to be on her deathbed when she is at this weight.
I was like, "WHAT?" I'm not bashing those who are thin; I am a size 2 myself who is just naturally thin, and this totally appalled me. For those of you who haven't seen the film, Bella looks grotesquely emaciated, along the lines of a Holocaust victim.
The point I'm trying to make is that it's time for us as women to embrace whatever size we may be and stop striving to look like skeletons. To those of you who are insecure about your weight, your SO obviously finds you sexy and appealing if he's marrying you, so it doesn't matter whether you are a 0, an 8, a 16, or a 24! Embrace yourself.
@tinylittlebird: The thread that you read probably wasn't the same one that everyone is referring to. If you just read it now, you probably saw the one that was rehashed from a year ago. The "fat bridesmaid" thread that started this all was soooooo much worse (though the one thats currently floating around is still pretty terrible). The mods eventually deleted the thread after multiple members complained. I knew I should have taken a screen shot! lol
This topic has been closed to new replies.
| Visit our sister sites | eHarmony Online Dating |
eHarmony Advice Dating Advice |
Project Wedding Wedding Songs |
JustMommies Pregnancy Calendar |
Create the honeymoon of your dreams.
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| Lyndzo | 46 |
| funkymunky85 | 26 |
| AshleyR83 | 24 |
| rebwana | 24 |
| mypinkshoes | 23 |
| his chippymunk | 23 |
| Ms. Salamander | 23 |
| Brielle | 22 |
| beargoose | 22 |
| kat2014 | 22 |
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| funkymunky85 | 9 |
| ebotlsrm | 5 |
| Lyndzo | 4 |
| mightywombat | 3 |
| AshleyR83 | 3 |
| rebwana | 3 |
| jules28 | 3 |
| sara_tiara | 2 |
| bookworm88 | 2 |
| KatyElle | 2 |
