(Closed) Impatiently waiting

posted 4 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
437 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

@sheep105:  Ugh, waiting can be such a b*tch, especially when the proposal obsession seed is planted in your head by those around you! I NEVER obsessed or even thought about marriage until my friends/my SO’s friends started asking “so when are you two getting married??” 

I think this is really weird…you and I have the same anniversary! Except mine is for 3 years, and I’m 95% sure he will be proposing. I don’t say this to upset you…I say it because I want to follow up with our age difference. My SO is 28 and I am 22. He has a career and I am going to veterinary school. And we also agreed to a LONG engagement. Every couple is different, and 21 and 23 with no job to pay for a ring and wedding is tough. Hell, I’m not even sure I’m ready as Im still a “poor college kid”. However, our long engagement offsets my lack of stability (financially and still maturity). 

Would your SO ever agree to a long engagement? Are your requirements for a ring holding him back from affording one? My SO has more expensive tastes than I, but I do know he had to scrounge a bit to purchase my between $5k-10k ring….so I think that’s why he and I looked at rings a year ago and he’s just now bought one.

Weddings are REALLY expensive, and even with our combined income of over $100k, I still panic thinking about affording a wedding! Being established in life, in my opinion, should come before marriage. I really think a longer engagement would do you both good…just my opinion. Good luck waiting, and enjoy your anniversary! I’ll be thinking of you on Friday! 🙂 

Post # 6
Member
367 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Hi sheep105!

It’s important to remember that you are both still young – 20 & 22. You have plenty of time to commit the rest of your lives together. My fiancé & I are only a bit older than you (24) and have only just got engaged. We have been together for over 5 years as well but we decided to wait until we were financially stable and independent to get engaged. It sounds like you’re not quite there yet if you’ve got another 2 years of university ahead of you and your boyfriend is just starting work. Do not let your friends and family pressure you into an engagement. Planning a wedding, juggling university and a career is hard!

Unless you plan on having your families pay for your wedding or you want to elope, I’d try just to enjoy the stage you’re at as it doesn’t really sound to me that you’re in a position to have a wedding.

If you really want the commitment of an engagement, I think you might have to be the one to propose as your boyfriend doesn’t sound like he’s there yet.

Good luck to you both!

Post # 8
Member
367 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@sheep105:  Congratulations on moving in together! It’s a really exciting time! We moved in together the August before last and it’s been great.

My FI is the same as your boyfriend – he wants a bigger wedding than I do! We’ve compromised on about 70 guests though, which seems massive to me but I think it’ll be OK!

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