In-Law drama!!!

posted 2 years ago in Family
Post # 2
1362 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Turf Valley

That’s a nutty thing to be kicked out about…  Since you didn’t really give any details I’ll just ignore that point.

People will side-eye them if they show up in black, lol.  

So sorry you’re having a headache with some junk!

Post # 3
1236 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014 - San Francisco, CA

That’s so awkward – I totally empathize. My FMIL has turned from sweet-but-mildly-dramatic family matriarch to raging control freak since the engagement (FI is her baby, youngest of five, only son.) All I can say is take the high road, rise above, ignore the tantrums, and pour yourself a really, really big glass of wine after you get off the phone with them.

Post # 4
957 posts
Busy bee

No one is going to care if they show up in black. I think people make too big of a deal about that. Black is a nice colour on some people.

My bridesmaids actually wore black. I chose black because I think it’s classy.

So whatever their intentions are, just ignore it and enjoy your wedding.

  • This reply was modified 2 years, 5 months ago by  MrsGatito.
Post # 5
6959 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

If they’re being that terrible about it, I would just stop saying anything about the wedding. They’re going to do what they want regardless, so it’s no use wasting energy on them.

Also, plenty of people wear black to weddings. Heck I’m wearing a black cocktail dress to my brother’s wedding coming up, and my mom wore black to mine. It’s fine and there were no “side-eyes”.

Post # 6
965 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

At least black is classic and clean and looks nice in photos. They could wear neon yellow or Hawaiian print. 

Try not to let the anger you have about their past behavior seep into details about your wedding. Is it annoying? Yes, but I would guess that their attitude bothers you more than the dresses. 

Post # 7
42082 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I see more amd more women wearing black at weddings, especially formal weddings,  and it has nothing to do with any sort of protest or comment on the realtionship.

Ignore them and have a wonderful wedding and marriage.

Post # 8
4634 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

They’re going to ruin your day, only if you let them. I think people who are passive aggressive are morons and tend to just ignore their attempts to bother/ hurt me.

When someone goes out of their way to act like that, they want a reaction.. Don’t give them that satisfaction, kill them with kindness.

Post # 9
5187 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2009 - New York, NY

Just ignore them and focus on enjoying your big day.

Post # 10
2364 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

SK1015:  It’s not about “wearing black”, am I right?  I think people are missing the point, here! 

It’s the “since we’re not in the wedding party…” passive aggressive bullshit.  Pay it no mind and enjoy your wedding!  

Post # 11
134 posts
Blushing bee

Don’t let them ruin your day – then they win. Let them make their passive aggressive comments and let them see that they don’t bother you. Enjoy your day!!

Post # 13
2782 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

SK1015:  My bridesmaids dresses were black— so there’s that.  

I am a person who wears mostly gray and black– but I don’t come across as a dark, morbid person.  I just prefer darker colors to brighter colors.  

Unless I specifically requested not to, I would most definitely choose a nice black dress for a wedding– family or not.

My sister’s bridesmaid’s dresses were also black, and she was married in August (mine was a winter wedding).  My MIL also chose a black dress for our wedding– and she asked me to OK the dress before she bought it.


I don’t see what the big deal is?

Post # 14
1527 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I am sorry, they are just being nasty.  They will wear what they want, and if you want tell the photographer to put them in back in pictures. 

Post # 14
1527 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I am sorry, they are just being nasty.  They will wear what they want, and if you want tell the photographer to put them in back in pictures. 

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