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Hmmm... that's tough. I'm so grateful that my future MIL was so accomodating when it came to her organizing my fiance's family guest list for me. Who from your fiance's side actually sent you the list? I'm going to assume it was his mother, so does your fiance have another relative that you might able to cross-check the list with? A grandmother, aunt, sister... maybe?
@amw511s: It's his mom's list but she can't help much because she is chronically ill. I've talked to his sister and she doesn't really have any answers!
I was almost in the exact situation with DH. His mom ignored requests for her address list for 11 months out of a 15 month engagement. And then handed over two names with misspelled addresses. Fortunately DH had a cousin get married last year and we pulled a bunch of names and addresses from their guest list. So awkward! I have a huge bear hug type family and wanted his family to be somewhat represented. At the end of the day the invitations for all of the questionable invitees (MILs cousin, MILs nieces and nephews) that DH didn't really know, got returned! It worked out, but I now have a few more gray hairs.
I figured that the people who know and love us found their way and anyone DH and I were funny about inviting probably shouldn't be there anyway!
@oliviaoblivia: Thanks so much for your post! It made me feel a lot better. That has been my attitude most of the time, but actually doing the addresses was causing bride brain to get the best of me. I want his family to be represented, especially considering how close I am with so much of mine--but the truth is that people who we want to be there are those that will be present the day of!! :)
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It took me 4 months to get the guest list for my fiance's side of the family...and when I finally got it, so much was unfinished and so many names were missing (of spouses, last names, etc.). I blew off sending StDs to anyone who I did not have a name or address for and figured I'd wait til the invites went out for those people.
Now it's crunch time and invites have to go out. I have gotten a lot of answers (still, some are undone and God knows how many names are spelled wrong), but the fact that no one knows whether some of the people on the list are married or have boyfriends or girlfriends worries me!
Anyone else looking at a list of people they've never met and wondering
1) who are these people and will they laugh when they see we invited them to our wedding;
2) whether they'll be offended that their name is spelled wrong or that I addressed it to their ex-spouse or assumed they are a Mrs.?
I wish I could just cut the list, but it's already a little uneven and I don't want to cause any drama!