In law issues UPDATED

posted 3 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
545 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@eecuadrado:  I think if you’re asking for boundaries, you need to clearly state what those are. I mean, you’re asking her to be gentle, but if she thinks she’s already being kind to you, it might be hard for her to change her behavior. She probably doesn’t realize she’s being pushy until after the fact. So be specific! Do you want her to communicate less with you? Not talk about the baby for a while? Talk to you via your husband? Wait for you to initiate communication with her?

Post # 5
Member
1625 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@eecuadrado:  I think that is a good response, I agree with your FI that it is kind but direct! You have to leave it in her hands now and hopefully she will be respectful.

Post # 7
Member
2179 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2024

Who the heck tells their FDIL that they are carrying a piece of them when they are pregnant? Someone super overbearing, that’s who! She needs to back off, this isn’t her baby it’s yours and FI’s and she needs to know boundaries now before the baby arrives.

Best of luck!

Post # 9
Member
11668 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@eecuadrado:   I don’t think it’s clear enough.  It’s very vague as to what boundaries you are talking about, but maybe that’s just because we don’t have all the details of the situation. I think you should state explicitly what the boundaries are: e.g., We ask that you please call before stopping over the house….

Maybe you guys can talk about it in person?  Tone is sometmes hard to read from e-mail.  

Also, I would have seriously lost it if someone said our baby was a piece of them lol. Sooo something my mom would say.  She actually made a comment along the lines of the baby is more hers then MILs because I’m her daughter.  Not sure how she came up with that one! Last I checked, it was equally DH and my baby.

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