Weddingbee boards

So I have a wedding website... at mywedding.com.  My wedding is over a year away and most wedding websites only hold your website for over a year or you can only do a year or whatever.  mywedding didn't have a limit on how long they will have your website and also it was free!

I have been using it for a few weeks now and I have tested out almost every feature.  I really like it... except for the RSVP function... because there is no way to set how many people can RSVP for, I'm sort of scared that people will RSVP for like 5 people when I only invited 2 from that family, sort of thing.  This is besides the point.

When I sent out my engagement party invitations I attached our wedding website and the password to it.  So the way mywedding.com works with a password is that you have to make an account, which is kind of lame but I had my bridesmaids sign up for it and they have been spam free for 2 weeks.  So I'm pretty sure it doesn't send you spam, I think it's just to remember what you have access to, just incase you forgot the password I gave you... it's kind of nice because I can change the password as many times as I want without having to consently tell people it's changed.

The reason I put a password on it because I put a lot of personal information about our wedding and stuff that I don't want just anyone to see.  Which I think is reasonable.  Plus I update it a lot with the going ons of my wedding and just our personal life.  ^_^

So on to my issue... my FH's parents have been... how can I say... not the most supportative people.  Sometimes I get the feeling they don't like me, my FH thinks it's b/c we are in Nor Cali and they are in So Cali and they haven't really had the time to get to know me nor have I them, so I'm probably just jumping to conclusions.  Ingore the fact that they flatly refused to do some traditions we are planning to do for the wedding and went as far as suggesting eloping.

We sent them an invite to the engagement party... and FH's mother calls saying she can't log in... we asked if she made an account and she said I have to make an account?  Then she said okay well I guess I won't look at it, you will just tell us everything we need to know, it's okay.

For some reason that really hurt my feelings.  Like I put a lot of effort into that site... I update it almost every other day with happenings going on with the wedding.  My aunts and uncles keep up to date with it b/c of that and my mother's friends.  My parents don't have internet at home so they can't see, though my mother is going to visit us or her friends to look at it soon because her friends say my website is very cute.

I sort of feel like FH's mother doesn't care about our wedding... because she can't make the slightest effort to view our wedding website...  Sure some people say older people are just like that... but my aunts and uncles and my mother's friends are about the same age as FH's parents and they all look at my website a lot!

I was visibly upset when FH told me about his mother's choice about not looking at our website... and he asked me what's wrong, so I explained and he actually was hurt too, he was like oh yeah why wouldn't they want to... I mean they should care a lot!  He kind of felt like they didn't love him.  I clamed him down because he shouldn't be upset at his parents, and of course they love him!  He should never question that.  He felt better... the thing I didn't say was they probably just didn't like me.

I don't know.  If this happened to you guys, would you be upset?

Thanks Tanya, good advice.  Yeah I feel like I'm over reacting and being sensitive... I just wish his parents would do something, anything to show they care but so far it feels like they don't.  ^_^  Thanks again.

Thanks West Coast Bride!  Your words were very encouraging, because I think you said a lot of things I was feeling but couldn't come out into words.  I know I shouldn't let this stuff to get me... but this happened 2 weeks ago, and I'm STILL thinking about it so I thought maybe writing it out to the board would help me.  ^_^  So far it seems to be doing what I have hoped. 

His parents are kind of striking me as strange right now, I have met them a couple of times for holidays and stuff and they have always been distant.  Maybe they will always be like this... I always hoped for in-laws that are loving and treat me like their kid but I don't think it will happen here.

I really enjoyed reading about how people's emotionals and reactions change through the wedding process, that was a real eye opener, I didn't even consider that.  Thanks again!

Hey MaryJane!  A Bee replied!  *getting over being star stuck*  ^_^

Thanks for all the great advise.  You could be right about the eloping and tradition thing... the eloping I understand now... I was mad about it at first, but I think now they were just trying to tell us that a wedding can be simple... I'm gald you can back me up on those thoughts. 

I can also see them being embrassed about doing traditions - if that was the case I would be okay with it, but their answer to why they didn't want to do the traditions because they were MY traditions and they didn't believe in them.  My FH talked to them and said it was important to me and my family and they finally said they would do them.

My FH has talked to his parents about this and they said they like me just fine or something to that affect, still their answer didn't sit well with me.  I think I'm just thinking too much about it. 

They made an off handish comment that some guys marry woman that steal him away from his family and that he should watch out for that - to me that felt like they were saying I was going to steal my FH away from them.

Of course I think I'm just seeing a lot of negative things coming from them.  I'm horrible I know... I need to give them more the benefit of the doubt.  I'm going to work on that.

Thanks!