(Closed) In Laws at Shower?

posted 6 years ago in Family
Post # 3
570 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I’d say invite them… they might not even show up if they feel like they don’t know you that well, but at least it’s on them. You could even head off your Future Mother-In-Law by telling her and other family members that you invited them and you’re so excited that you can use the wedding as a conduit for getting to know them better! You really hope they’ll come so that you can spend a little time with them in a smaller setting!! Then if she chooses to talk smack, it’s on her because other people have heard your reasons already- she’ll just sound whiny and bitter. Hopefully, though, she’ll have nothing nasty to say and you truly will be able to connect more with his family!


Post # 4
3574 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

If they are not long distance, I think you should definitely invite them.

Post # 5
3082 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I would invite them

Post # 7
7561 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

I think you’re kind of obligated to invite them. They might have family drama, but the best way to stay out of it is to act like you’re oblivious. 

Post # 8
9955 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

Lol, screw what other people think… (including your FMIL)

The right thing to do here… Etiquette wise is to invite them.

Honestly, Etiquette is important when planning a wedding because it sets you up in good stead for your social life in the future… WHY should you stand by your Inlaws realtionship with these Ladies… the future is yours and your “married life” and the Friends & Family Members that YOU CHOOSE to bring into it.

Who knows you may even become “the darling couple” that all the relatives want to socialize with.



Post # 9
211 posts
Helper bee

If the problem is really only about how the Mother-In-Law will react to your decision, what about having her make the decision of whether or not to invite them?  Then she can’t throw it in your face.

Post # 11
488 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I think it would be a nice way to sort of “bring the family together”!  I say do it, and like the other posts said, be totally oblivious to the drama 🙂

Post # 12
155 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I’m not inviting Fi cousins. I’m inviting his mon, SIL, and aunts. The rest of the shower guest list will be my friends and close relatives. I believe that bridal showers are best when small, intimate and comprised of people close to the bride. I don’t know his extended family and would feel uncomfortable/gift grabby by inviting them.

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