Post # 1
I have NO idea what to do, and I’m hoping someone can offer some advice.
I don’t know if this is normal behaviour or not. My FMIL & FFIL wiped their hands of the rehearsal dinner, isn’t attending my shower AND every time my fiance and I try to discuss anything to do with the wedding with them, they turn it into a conversation about his brothers wedding that is 4 months after ours.
My FSIL (who is one of my MOH’s) has a similar reaction when we talk “wedding”…it becomes about my FBIL’s wedding, and she’s not attending the rehearsal because it’s “inconvenient” for her.
I’ve thought about asking if there’s something wrong, or if we’ve (more specifically I’ve) done anything to upset them. I just get the feeling that they are not excited or wanting this wedding to happen at all. Should I just sit back and hope it clears up as we get closer (we’re only about 5 weeks till the wedding now), or do I say something to find out what the deal is?
Any advice is appreciated 🙂 Thanks.
Post # 3
They don’t have to attend the rehearsal, my FIL’s won’t be. It is only a big deal if you make a big deal out of it.
Post # 4
What does your FI say?
Honestly, to me, this is weird and hurtful. I get that you can’t control other people, but these are events that usually both families attend.
I’m sorry. 🙁
Post # 5
FI is also hurt that they are acting this way, but is unsure of the cause either. He is in the same position as me, not sure if WE should say something, HIM say something privately, or just pretend everything is fine.
Post # 6
It’s not going to go away if you don’t say something to them. If you’re not comfortable doing it, I’d at least have your fi say something.
Post # 7
I can relate..and I’m the type to stay quiet..and that’s what I did (in previous relationships). I didn’t end up saying anything..but it did bother me…and I somewhat grew to resent the people involved. I think it should be coming from your Fi.maybe a talk from your Fi would make them realize what they are doing is harmful to your future relationships with them. I hope things work out.
Post # 8
I would ask my FI to speak with his parents. It’s not just the issue of the rehearsal.He needs to be clarify if they are hosting the rehearsal dinner, if not why not, and if not, the two of you need to make alternate plans.