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Sorry to hear your father in law won't be there. I'm going thru the same thing. My FIL passed a couple months ago and we want to do the same thing but have no clue how to. Sorry I was no help
We are honoring my parents with a similar candle and vase of flowers set off to the side at the reception -- without mention anywhere. The candle also honors my FI's grandmother. My father passed last year and my mother has been deceased for nearly 20 years.
I know you didn't ask about this, but I am also having a rose placed in the seats at the ceremony where they would have been seated. There will be no mention during the ceremony of the memorials due to my FI's loss of sister only months ago. His mom doesn't want to mention her for fear it will bring everyone down being so recent. She will have a rose on her chair as well. The roses will be placed before anyone arrives for the ceremony, as to not draw attention. We will have a memorial in the program as well. No chairs are reserved at the reception, only the ceremony which will be less than 30 minutes, but is very important to me.
I am honoring my father, grandmother, and my fiance's grandparents with candles as well.
I am using some hurricane vases I got at Michael's with pillar candles inside. I wrapped a 2 inch band of vellum paper which I had printed on using MS Publisher and my inkjet. I wrote In loving Memory, their names, then who they were (ex... father of the bride). I attached it w/ scrapbooking tape.
They will be pre-lit during the ceremony and will be placed on a table during the reception as well....I also placed a "In Memoriam" in the program with a Wordsorth poem I love.
I knew I couldn't handle having it mentioned during the ceremony, but I knew i wanted to honor my dad in another special way so I made the small picture frame charms to have tied into my bouquet as well.
I have seen locket cufflinks, I know of some who have placed loved one's pictures in them so they could be there with them during the day without drawing too much attention.
Hope this helps.
I had the missing loved ones names etched into a hurricane vase on one side and tiger lillies on the other side. I am able to use this vase in my home after the wedding. We lit a candle in the vase and had placed it right next to the piano during the ceremony.
We went to an American Cancer Society benefit Saturday night and they had the prettiest memorial set up. It was tall glass vases with white floating candles in them and wrapped around the outside of the vases was a strip of handmade white paper with the person's name calligraphed (sp!) on it. The names were lit from within and it was very pretty.
Thank you for your comments! I know that it will mean a lot to my fiance to do something quietly.
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We would like to have a candle lit in memory of my fiances father. I was thinking a pilar candle, somehow labeled "In loving memory" but I haven't the slightest where to put it! My fiance would like for it not be be a part of the ceremony, or have additional attention drawn. Simply a reminder that he is still in everyones heart.
Where do I put it? How do I label it? Pictures...maybe?
Thanks!