Post # 1
Being with a man in the military I have been preached to that “flexibility is key”. Well today is the first time I’ve really been challenged by this idea and I’m looking for some outside advice. Due to some changes beyond our control Fiance is being moved to a different training class with a later graduation date that is after our September 8th wedding. While in training it is super difficult to get leave approved, and with a new flight commander we’re unsure of how flexible he will be with leave. Right now the way I see it we have three options:
1. Keep the date we already set. We have our invites ready to be mailed and have already put deposits on our vendors for the day. Pray that he is able to get leave and figure out alternative transportation ideas (there’s no way they’ll give him the week off to travel).
2. Push the date back to one that will work with his training schedule and talk to our vendors (thankfully all of them are military friendly and understanding) and see if we can work out a new date at our venue. In this case we might be in contention with another friend who will be getting married about the say day/time. Order new invites (yay Vistaprint Groupon!) and have an easier time getting leave.
3. Elope in the next couple weeks. His schedule will be pretty slow as he is ahead of his new class. We could cancel and get our deposits refunded to have an impromptu wedding back near our families. We have all the necessities for the wedding and an elopement sounds uber romantic, but our Out of Town guests would probably be unable to make it.
I keep going back and forth between all three of these options and need some clear-minded third party opinioins! Any alternative ideas are welcome too, thanks bees!!
Post # 3
I would not keep the date that you have. What if he couldn’t get off that time? Just not have the wedding? That seems like the worst idea out of the three. As for your 3rd option about eloping….it’s a little confusing. Usually eloping is just the two of you with no guests or maybe only a couple of guests, so I am not sure what you mean by the Out of Town guests not being able to make it?
I would move the date to a date that you KNOW he can be off. That way you get to have your wedding and don’t have to wing anything!!
Post # 4
I think #2 is the best option – given that you you know of this other friend’s wedding, make it a point to not be in direct coflict with that day (I don’t see why you would have to have it on the same exact day as other friend). Just avoid the conflict and make sure he can get the time off!
Post # 5
Thanks for the advice 🙂
@thenuggetbride: With the eloping aspect, I guess my idea of an elopement was more like last minute whirlwind wedding as opposed to just the two of us, our family is a really improtant part of our lives and definitely need to be there.
@MsMindle: The reason I’m concerned about interfering with our friend’s wedding is because once Fiance is done with this portion of training he has to go to a survival training for 6 weeks, and it isn’t unheard of for them to have to leave within a few weeks of winging for it. That situation leaves one “safe date” which is the same day as our friends wedding two states away :/
Post # 6
@snp0207: Yikes – best discuss it with the friend then (especially if you guys have mutual friends that might already be attending theirs)!
Post # 7
- Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA
My vote would be to do an intimate ceremoney and elope now with just have your nearest and dearest– then have a full reception after he graduates where all the Out of Town people can make it too. This is very common for people with big families that live far apart– have a wedding at one spot, and a 2nd reception at the other. My cousin did this because his wife’s family was all in Mexico and it would have been too expensive for all 100+ of them to travel.
Post # 8
So two for push the date back and one for elopement. Anyone else have some thoughts?