(Closed) In the case of a broken engagement, would you give the ring back?

posted 4 years ago in Legal
  • poll: Would you give the ring back?
    HE-- No! -It's MY ring...end of story : (49 votes)
    18 %
    Yes, it wouldn't do me any good to keep it : (146 votes)
    54 %
    I'm going straight to the pawnshop! lol! : (25 votes)
    9 %
    other...please explain : (48 votes)
    18 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    45395 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    The ring goes back, no ifs, ands, or buts. The ring is a given in anticipation of a marriage.

    It is not a no-strings attached gift.

    When the engagement is off the table, the ring is off the finger.

     

    Post # 4
    Member
    33 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    I feel like I would cry and not be able to give it back– I wouldn’t wear it, but it’s a token of a relationship that should have changed your life (and we’ve been together three years, so significantly longer attachment :))

    Post # 5
    Member
    459 posts
    Helper bee

    @Soon2BeeFirstLadyJee:  if I were the one to break off the engagement, I would absolutely give it back…but if he broke it off…I might keep it.  Or if it was a mutual decision we came to..

     

    This would be a hard situation to be in..but I just can’t see keeping the ring if I broke off the engagement as well.

    Post # 6
    Member
    145 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    For me, it depends on who ended it. If he ended it, I would most certainly not give the ring back. I wouldn’t wear it either though. Most likely, I’d sell it.

    Post # 7
    Member
    70 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    @Soon2BeeFirstLadyJee:  it depends.  One of my friends paid more than half the price for her ring.  When he left her, I really thought she had every right to keep the ring.   (I’m not sure what she ended up doing.)

    Post # 8
    Member
    805 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 2012

    it’s a gift. if there’s no guilt on my part for ending the engagement, I’d keep it. otherwise I’d give it back out of guilt. he wouldn’t want it anyway, it was meant for me.

    Post # 9
    Member
    11287 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2012

    i didn’t keep my previous engagement rings.  i felt it was the right thing to do to return them.

    Post # 10
    Member
    5462 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2016

    If I was in your friend’s situation I would give it back. If me and my SO broke up I probably wouldn’t. We have been together almost 5 years and my future e-ring is going to have my moms diamonds in it, so no I wouldn’t give it back.

    Post # 11
    Member
    1330 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: February 2015 - Mount Hermon

    I agree with PP, if he breaks it off, you can do what you want with it.  If she breaks it off, give it back.  Assuming he paid for it.  If that’s not the case, then it gets more complex.

    Post # 12
    Member
    115 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I personally think as long as he paid for it, he gets it back. If he broke it off do you really want to look at it? The ONLY exception I can think is if it is your family’s heirloom. For instance, my sister has my grandmother’s ring, he would NOT get to keep that.

    Post # 13
    Member
    892 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    I think where I live, the law is that if the engagement ends, you have to give the ring back (assuming your SO bought it).

    Post # 14
    Member
    9173 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

    If it was a mutual breakup or even if he broke my heart but wasnt a dick about it, I’d give it back. If he cheated or something, I’d pawn that shit!

    Post # 15
    Member
    734 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    @Soon2BeeFirstLadyJee:  

                           I would give the ring back, I wouldn’t want bad memories hanging around me if he were the one to break it off. If I broke it off, I wouldn’t want to keep it because I would feel guilty having that reminder that I broke someone’s heart. I would be mature enough to work out and split the costs already spent on the wedding itself (especially if it came out of just his or just my account, I think its only fair to split that as a wedding is mutual expense) 

    Post # 16
    Member
    10456 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2014

    Depends who ends it. If it was me, I’d give it back. Him, I wouldn’t want to. And if he cheated I absolutely would not give it back. 

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