Post # 1
Hello I’m new around here and to the whole wedding thing in general.
My brother is getting married and I was asked to be a bridesmaid in the wedding I didn’t feel I could say no so I agreed. Problem is I have only met the bride once, I live in another state, and financially I’m not really in a possition to be making additional trips besides for the actual wedding.
I know I have been invited to things such as the bridal shower and bachelorete party. I feel awkward about the whole thing.
I know I can’t make it to the events but I feel bad about it. Also should I make sure to send a present for the bridal shower even though I can’t go?
So what are the things I need to make sure I do?
Post # 3
Honestly, I only expected my BMs to pay for their dresses and be there for the wedding. I think some people are a little crazy with what they “require” their BMs to do. Heelloo…aren’t these your friends? We had my shower the week before the wedding because everyone lived out of town. And 2 BMs still couldn’t make it.
When the invitations come up, I would give the bride a call and politely explain what you just said here–you would love to be there but just can’t afford the extra trip. If you can afford to send a gift, that is great. For the bachelorette party, perhaps you could send the organizer (MOH?) some money to contribute, even if you can’t be there for the actual event.
Post # 4
I think they probably dont expect you for the shower and bachelorette, but it is polite to send you an invite. I agree, just be clear with saying what you can do.
Post # 5
I would just explain to the hosts of the parties that you are not able to come. Also, be sure you talk to your brother and his fiance too and let them know. Don’t just RSVP no with no explanation to them. I think you should also send a gift for the shower even if you can’t come.