Post # 1
Wondering if I have the only oddball FIL’s, because ever since I met them they always bring up these odd things to discuss that I’d rather never hear about. All centered on my FH of course. Such as; my FH’s “whoreish”ways in high school, his ex-girlfriends, his ex wife (ugh!), his ex girlfriends breast implants (I’m a small B cup), his ex-girlfriend and ex-wife on their facebook “friends” list. I mean the list goes on and on. I just sit there smiling hoping the convo changes to another subject, but I could care less and something I don’t want to know about.
Post # 3
wow, that is awkward. Do they either really dislike their son, or else are they *trying* to get you to not marry him?
Post # 4
My IL’s make sex jokes all the time.
FFIL: If you would excuse me, I must go service my wife now.
Post # 5
@ms.charming: DH’s mom does the same darn thing. She has told me abotu hearing him have sex when he was younger, tells me about his gf’s, and she still hangs out with his ex-wife and claimed that she told her about DH’s “skills in the sack” GROSS!!!!. What’s worse is that she told me this. It’s tough to deal with. Although, his mother is a total nut job all around, so I would expect nothing less.
Post # 6
Have you tried telling them that those topics make you a little uncomfortable? You don’t have to make a big thing of it (at least at first). Start by assuming the best – that they’re nice but clueless and don’t know that they’re weirding you out.
Post # 7
They are either insanely clueless or passive-aggressive. But that those are not normal conversation topics to have with your son’s FI.
I think your FI needs to have a talk with them and tell him that he knows that kind of talk makes HIM uncomfortable and he’s sure it probably bothers you too and that that it needs to stop. By having him approach it that way, they see him as the “sensitive” one, rather than as you being a big baby who knew your FI had a past when you got involved with him, but aren’t mature enough to handle it. That’s not my opinion btw, but if they are crazy enough to talk that way in front of you, they might well think like that too.
Post # 8
@mwitter80: Wow, just wow. The things some of you have to deal with. I can’t even imagine. I’m very sorry your MIL is like that.
Post # 9
Thinking about my FMIL makes me nervous. I’ve never met her, nor does she even know we are engaged. And unless someone spills the beans we most likely will not tell her until right before the STDs go out. The stories I have heard… I won’t make FH go through that. She honestly asked when we were going to give her a grandbaby like two months after we moved in together. (so 14 months of dating) I can’t complain as I don’t deal with her while FH has to deal all the time with my crazy mom!
Post # 10
My FH has warned me, as well as both of his brothers and his two SIL’s that his mother is a total nutjob. Lol. I didn’t believe it until now.
Post # 11
Coming at this from a different perspective…
I strayed a bit in HS. I became experminetal with drugs (nothing hard, just weed) and picked up smoking. I started dating a guy who was older and when I ended the relationship he went psycho and tried to kill my family.
My parents bring it up every.time.we’re over. “At least your not like her crazy ex boyfriend who tried to kill us in out sleep! What were you thinking when you dated him?” I kindly try to joke about it and then steer conversation but no matter how many times I tell them to stop it’s like they don’t realize they do it!
I think it might just be them trying to make you feel better about getting him after he went through his phase? I don’t know? Maybe they think it will make you see what a great person he has become?
Post # 12
My FH is a wonderful man and he never hid anything from me. Sometimes I wish he would have, I seem to know more than is good for my soul, but I love him. I’m wondering whether his parents aren’t testing me or feeling the waters, to see how I’ll react to their news.
At some point, once FH is back from deployment and he and I visit his parents, I’m sure he or I will say something. I’m ready to not hear all this nonsense repeated at every visit.
Post # 13
Some of these in laws sound absolutely CRAZY!!!!! Ladies, dealing with the nut job in laws, you have my sympathy. I would def. have my fiance speak to his parents if they showed this kind of behavior….