Funny Informational Brochure

posted 3 years ago in Paper
Post # 3
Member
729 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@JenGirl:  I think this is cute and funny for nontraditinal brides.

I would maybe reword the “homeless guy” bit unless your dad thinks its funny too.

Maybe reword with something like, “Hey there Mister, can I get a ride?” or “Don’t worry the Van goes to the venue/hotel/etc not The Lighthouse.

 

I would love to see more suggestions on that. We area actually using a wheelchair accessible shuttle that used to belong to my dad’s friend who used it for his grocery store. It still has his logo on the side! haha! A friend used it for their wedding too and they loved it! 

Post # 4
Member
1951 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

@JenGirl:  very cute – but I did notice you need to add a period at the end of the “Old Fashioned” sentence.

Post # 6
Member
8907 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

Aw so cute!

2 things – the “can you guess what we’re wishing for” part confused me. Is it supposed to be obvious (seems like it), and if so, will it be to your guests? If it’s not supposed to be obvious, maybe reword it so it doesn’t sound like it. Second, the wine and beer part kinda blends in with the vodka lemonade, so that it’s not readily apparent that there’s also beer and wine unless you read every word. 

Love it 🙂

Post # 9
Member
2341 posts
Buzzing bee

@JenGirl:  mad eme smile! two things that stoodf out to me – the first you said you’d change (re homeless guy) & the second is that the line ‘it’s not that we don’t like’ was used twice (cake + flowers). I’d maybe change the cake to ‘ As we love so many dessrts we couldn’t really settle on one!’ or something better thatyou can come up with 🙂

Great work!

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