Internet friend sent me suicide note – help!

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
4483 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

If you know her full name and town, call the police. They can find her address from there

Post # 4
Member
54 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

@Bainise2013:  She’s in the US? Call the 1-800-SUICIDE number or if you know exactly where she is call 911. They will be your best advocates for you to try to help her.

Post # 6
Member
7997 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

I would let authorities in her country know – her IP address can be tracked. She will thank you later. Hopefully it’s not too late. *Hugs*

Post # 7
Member
2565 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

+1 to PPs, if you know her name and address contact the police.  If you know any contact info for any of her friends/family contact them.  

Post # 9
Member
462 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Call a suicide hotline and let them know that you don’t know where she lives, but you can give them access to her profiles so they may be able to track the IP. If they can find her and you end up being wrong, she will only get questioned by police. I had to call police when one of my internet friends called me saying she was going to kill herself. I knew her address though, and called the police in her area. They went to her house and questioned her. It did break up our relationship a lot. She understood why I did it, but was upset with me for a long time and our relationship diminished a lot. She is still alive though.

Post # 11
Member
462 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Just be there for her. Talk to her, let her know she’s loved and cared about. I don’t know if there’s much else to do other than support her

Post # 12
Member
1133 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Bainise2013:  do everything you can. Calleveryone you can. Don’t worry about being wrong. Better to raise a false alarm thanfind out later she died. It’s okay to be wrong.

Do something before you regret it.

Post # 14
Member
1007 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@Bainise2013:  At the risk of getting flamed, statistically, people that make threats of suicide, vague or otherwise, are not actually going to attempt it. It’s merely a means of getting attention, in many cases. Ones that are serious about it, rarely ever actually tell anyone about it, because they do not want anyone to stop them.

I have had online friends that have done the same thing to me. One in particular (“Mary”) reaches out to me every few months or so, and vascillates between being ‘on the road to recovery’ to threatening to jump off the Golden Gate Bridge. Any time Mary’s threatened suicide, I tell her I hope she reconsiders it, but I am not going to try to talk her out of it. Don’t rise to the bait, regardless of what she says. Your friend can help herself, but only if she really wants to. I know it sucks to feel helpless, but it’s up to them to make the change, you can’t do it for them.

That said, if you are truly worried about her actually attempting suicide, call a suicide hotline and ask them what would be an acceptable action for you to take given the circumstances–they may be able to advise you or give you better info than on here.

Best of luck, keeping fingers crossed for you and your friend! *hugs*

Post # 15
Member
1133 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Sweet_Tea:  I have to disagree with this advice. I think research has been done, and the idea that those who talk about it will not do it has been proven false. Many people who kill themselves have given off warning signs. This is probably because almost everyone in that situation is torn. They do not want to die, but want to escape the situation they are in and cannot figure out how else to do it.

Of course, that does not mean everyone who talks about it will reach the point of doing it, and, yes, it is difficult to have a needy friend who takes you down that road more than once.

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