- Blog
- Bios
- Boards
- Classifieds
- DIY
- Gallery
- Vendor Reviews
- Shop Weddingbee
Weddingbee boards
To me.. skin is just a color. Not an issue.
I dont see a race. I see people... with that perpspective, its never ever been a problem!
Good question tho!
I'm Mexican and and BF is American. I always thought I would marry a Mexican guy and sometimes I do wish he was Mexican. Especially since I was born and raised in Mexico and it'll be perfect for me if I could live there AND have him. He doesn't speak a word of Spanish which is hard, and sometimes I am amazed he likes me because English is not my mother language and I'm so much more intelligent and funny in Spanish LOL. I have no idea how though the cultural differences will get down the road, so far the main one is that he's not as romantic and expressive as the Mexican guys I've dated: in Mexico guys would tell me "I love you" after two weeks of dating (sometimes even before we started dating!) and it took him A YEAR to be capable of saying it, an issue that almost made us break up! I later realized that for most Americans saying "I love you" to a bf or gf is a big deal. Oh well, at least I know he means it now! I could write about this interacial issue forever! Curious to hear other people's experiences.
The boy and I are in a somewhat interracial relationship. I am caucasian (Eastern European/Jewish descent) and he is Filipino/Eastern European born in the Philippines and raised somewhat Catholic.
I have never once wished we were the same race, but I also have always imagined myself dating someone of a different race! I think it helps that he is pretty "white" having grown up mostly in SoCal (lived in Philippines and Saudi Arabia when he was younger).
I love that I can go to his house and "Nanai" (grandma) is always cooking some yummy food that I didn't grow up with :D
To be honest, my ex of four years was Caucasian with a pretty "WASP"-ish family and it was a little boring because we were too similar :/
as a product of an interracial relationship, i'm always in an interracial relationship unless i was dating someone of the same racial mix [i'm korean and black and my mister is black with a touch of white somewhere down the line]. to me, it's all i've known. never really saw race as a reason to preclude someone. i know some people believe that marriage is hard enough without throwing race in, but from what i've seen, it's really more because of the result of external societal pressures than anything else. it's hard when your loved ones don't accept the person you're dating/married too, but that isn't exclusive to race.
while i did think it would be cool to date someone who was also korean and black, i never wished my mister was the same race as me. underneath it all, we're both very similar anyway
I'm Canadian (Scottish-German background) and my husband is Korean. We live in Korea.
Race is absolutely not a factor for us. It's just what you look like. And if we had been both born and raised in the same culture, cultural background would not have been a problem. I have lots of friends in interracial relationships back home who are really from the same Canadian culture, so there are really no major differences. However, me living in his culture (which is radically different from my own) is a constant struggle. I've been here for nearly 5 years, so it is getting better, but it's still something I'm dealing with. I love my husband though, so until he is ready to leave Korea and until we have a good plan as to how to both have jobs in Canada, my cultural struggle is something that I have agreed to live with for the sake of relationship happiness.
I am black and FI is Spanish. I don't see race and I don't wish we were the same race though. So far it has been tough for my family but they better get over it because he is who I have fallen in love with and will marry.
Hello,
I'm in a mixed race relationship. I am caucasian, he is Chinese. We're both nearly 30. I have a very good job, a great education and own my own home.
His parents absolutely despise me. If they see us together in public we get yelled at. They refuse to meet me. And it's been years and years... My SO hates going to the supermarket, mall, out in public with me etc.
I still can't decide why they came to this country and raised their kids here. They didn't bother to teach them their native tongue or any of their customs. They raised them as boring old kiwi kids, and now they have issues their son is with a white girl?
Wierd eh? He does stand up for me. And as long as he always stands up for me we'll be fine.
I guess some people are lucky, some aren't?
I am white and he is middle eastern, but we were both born as Americans. I'm probably more ethnic than he is. :-)
We're not REALLY interacial--i'm part korean but he's pretty much all polish/german. But my mom is half korean and my dad is white so i've seen some dynamic through my mom's side of the family. I love being part korean though. Love it. I'm sad the korean part is getting "watered down" with my kids and they'll only be 1/8th and chances are you won't be able to tell they have korean in them =(. Skin color doesn't matter to me and I have dated men of other nationalities, although there are some races and mixes that i find more attractive than others and have naturally been drawn to in the past (particularly asian-white mixes) but I've always been open minded. Sometimes i wish DH was 'mixed' somehow...sometimes i'm amazed i ended up with a regular ole white guy, considering i've always dated mixed men in the past. like a half chinese half caucasian guy who looked like heath ledger, haha! Yum =].
@babyboo, i totally know what you mean!!! bbq and beer is not near as fun and exciting as platters of ethnic food, homemade by the grandma =]
I'm caucasian and my hubby is Indian. I never wish he were white, because that implies that I'm not 100% happy with who he is. I do, however, sometimes wish our cultural differences weren't as different, but that does not mean that I ever wish he were white. :) Our cultural differences can be tough due to his family living over in faraway India and such...most of the time, I embrace our differences. :)
I'm black and fiance is white. I don't wish that we were the same race. Our differences enhance our relationship. I do sometimes wish that people were more accepting, but at the end of the day we love each other and that's all that matters.
my FI and I are the same race, but before him, I was mainly involved in interracial relationships because those seemed like the most successful ones for me. I am black and I have dated many other races (Mexican, Puerto Rican, Middle Eastern, Italian, etc), you can say I'm an equal opportunity dater lol. But I never thought I would end up marrying anyone else but a black man for some reason. Even though some of them were great guys, I just probably was too cowardice for the differences.
It seems like this is more of a cultural thing than a race thing. My FI and I are interfaith, but both technically the same race and were born and raised in the US. But we have different "cultures" to some extent. I am from a lower middle-class or working class background. FI is upper middle-class.
His friends all went to private schools, never had jobs before graudating from college or professional school, have been backpacking through Europe etc. He also relates to his parents much differently than I do and has a different relationship in general with family and friends. We are both very open minded and understanding of each other, but sometimes I can't help but think he can't completely understand me.
Hmm, we are inter-everything I think. I'm British and he is American. We are also interracial as I am black (of African descent) and he is half white (Polish) and half Asian (quarter Japanese, quarter Chinese). The racial thing is a non-issue for us as we don't really even notice that we are different. Of course, the wedding will be an interesting test to see how extended family respond to the reality of us being one forever. Personally I love our little United Colours of Benetton household, it really makes life very interesting.
I'm Chinese and FI is Lebanese. I love that we are from different races, but I think we've been lucky because both of us and our families are open-minded about it. It also helps that both our families speak English so communication is not hard. I find myself relating to other Chinese Americans more in general and always thought I'd end up marrying a Chinese person, but that was before I found FI. I definitely want our kids to experience both cultures growing up.
i'm white and my fiance is indian. i never wish we were the same race. the only problems we've ever had started with planning the wedding and his parents having a different idea of what we'd be doing for the ceremony and reception. he doesn't feel a strong connection to his culture, so we pretty much think exactly the same.
My DH and I are both white, but both have dated outside our race before getting together. We just ended up falling in love with each other, and we happen to look like brother and sister. Oh well!! :-P It'll be easy to predict what our children will look like - clones of us.
I'm in an interacial relationship as well. I am white, and my SO is Asian (his parents immigrated here a number of years ago, but he was born in the US). I have studied many foreign cultures during school and spent time in over 17 countries, so for me to be in a relationship with someone of a different race was not a surprise. For my parents and his parents, however, it was pretty much the end of the world. His parents did not like the fact that I am a different race and a different religion from them (even though my SO and I are the same religion - Christian). And my folks would remind me all the time of the dangers of dating an Asian...so sad. They wouldn't even carry on a conversation with him for several months and because my SO wants their approval before asking for my hand in marriage, we have put off engagement for months already.
I put my time and energy into showing my SO's parents that I understand and care about their culture...i.e. I would do household chores for his mom (typical of what a daughter-in-law would do), I bought a book and began teaching myself their language (with the help of my SO), and I would do extra little things for them as needed. My SO did the same for my family by going out of his way to do chores and projects for them (like painting and helping with big projects).
Its crazy how receptive everyone was to this...after about 6 months my parents have appologized and told my BF to "go for it" (to marry me) and his folks have been showing me off to relations (they ask me to show off my language skills and they say "she looks white, but she acts Asian.")
I know most people wouldn't want to go this far to make a relationship work, but my BF and I love each other very much and we want our families on board with our relationship...honestly it was worth the extra 6 months of waiting! We've been talking about engagement for the last few months and hopefully will finally get engaged this summer!!!
Woa! Long post! So sorry!
@melissa: my ex and I could pinpoint exactly what our future children would have looked like: dirty blonde hair, blue eyes, short, etc. I fit in with his family 10x better than my own!
I'm Chinese and FI is half Japanese, half Caucasian. Race has never been an issue in our relationship. I see so many interracial couples here in SoCal... no one even thinks twice about it. In fact, most of my friends (married or not) are in interracial relationships. We joke about who can make the most "mixed" baby. 
I adore my FILs, FI adores my parents... everyone adores each other, lol!
@tobin: I'm so sorry and sad to hear that your SO hates going out in public with you! That is a serious no-no! Have you talked through this with him??
@blab Is he Indian or from another Asian country? Just curious since my new hubby is Indian. I'm glad both families came around! :)
I'm an American born Korean (interesting there are so many Korean/Korean mixes here!) and my SO is caucasian. I've had 'dad issues' and happened to date all other races except asian, although I do wonder what it would have been like. Because of my dislike of my dad as a person, I've never really been attracted to most asian men.
I'm Mexican and FI is Scottish/Irish and never in a million years would I want to marry within my own culture. Not to bag on my culture but ALL the hispanic guys I've dated are just a big fat NO! My FI is the perfect match for me but I think its because is momma raised him right. I love that woman!
My Husband is caucasian and I'm Filipino-Sri-lankan. I think there are definitely moments when i have to explain things (why my family does what it does) but in general it makes it a little more interesting. I think we really feel that we're an interracial couple when we're traveling. We visit my in-laws in South Carolina and we definitely get looks. I think my in-laws love that we're an interracial couple. Seriously. They can't wait for interracial grandkids.
My FI is Cuban and I am caucasion. His parents came to America in the early 70s and my FI was born here in America. We aren't interracial by looks - except that for a lot of my mannerisms, his family makes comments like "that is a white people thing" or "only white people do that" - by all appearances my FI looks white, and while I don't care at all what color his skin is, it does bother me when they separate us by making comments about me being "white" - my family would never say "oh that is a cuban thing". It is also difficult because despite being in America for almost 40 years his parents do not speak much english and I speak no spanish. My FI is bilingual and tries to translate - so I hope that some of the "white people" comments are lost in translation?
im black (with a bit of irish and seminole indian) and FH is white (polish and irish). i could care less what he looks like, because race isnt really an issue. its how a person acts. i know lots of blacks who are nothign like me - so i find it odd to want to marry someone in your race just because they are the same race. people are different no matter whta you look like so it follows that you will fall in love with different people. its the soul not the looks! :)
I'm white and jewish - a good mix of Irish, Polish, Russian and Italian and a second generation Canadian! He is a first generation Canadian and 100% Armenian. He speaks perfectly fluent English as well as Armenian with his family, so I am learning to speak Armenian too. It's definitely a challenge, but already speaking some french and hebrew, it hasn't been as hard as it could have been. It's fun to have our own secret language! I was raised in a Jewish home since my mom is Jewish (definitely liberal though), so there are many similarities in our cultures like the food and closeness with family, plus the geographical and historical political similarities. I'm not religious and neither is he, so we are actually a perfect match in that way. We "get" each other on a level that we haven't found with other people.
I'm half chinese/half caucasian and my FI is caucasian. I only recently thought of myself as bi-racial! Nobody has really every pointed it out to me, so I didn't think much of it, I'm just me.
I think my FI's gram has a tiny issue with him not marrying a full caucasian woman, but she's never said anything to me or him about it. Luckily we've never had any issues because where we live, it's not uncommon to see a mixed couple.
Also, my very traditional chinese grandfather, did not like the idea of my mom marrying a caucasian man (which ended in divorce a few years ago) so I'm not sure how he feels about my marriage. He does not speak english, and I do not speak cantonese, so he couldn't tell me anyway!
I guess I am mixed (some wouldn't consider East Indian a different race from Euro-Americans, but it certainly feels like it to me), and DH is white. I was raised here, but there are definitely a lot of cultural differences (a LOT of them have to do with views on how to raise children). Most of the time it's not a big deal, but I'm a lot more sensitive to racial/cultural issues than he is, generally. I suppose if my mother had also been Pakistani, we'd have a lot more differences to navigate!
My parents and my grandparents (on my mom's side) are all interracial couples! My Grandfather was Mexican/Native American and my grandmom is German/American.
FI and I aren't interracial really (unless you count that I'm techinically 1/4 Mexican) but he's Catholic and I'm Jewish, so I guess that counts too?
Eh, I honestly had a lot of pressure to marry/date "within" - religion not race per se - but I can't imagine anyone being more perfect for me than my FI.
You must log in to post.
| Visit our sister sites | eHarmony Online Dating |
eHarmony Advice Dating Advice |
Project Wedding Wedding Songs |
JustMommies Pregnancy Calendar |
Create the honeymoon of your dreams.
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| Lyndzo | 52 |
| Brielle | 41 |
| mypinkshoes | 34 |
| Cady | 32 |
| AshleyR83 | 30 |
| fivemonthsnotice | 28 |
| ndreighton | 27 |
| rebwana | 26 |
| funkymunky85 | 26 |
| fishbone | 26 |
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| tenacity | 4 |
| Cady | 4 |
| imageeksowhat | 3 |
| Ms Flamenco | 3 |
| This Time Round | 3 |
| keepsmiling19 | 2 |
| ChicChick | 2 |
| Sasha2011 | 2 |
| ladybugmommy2010 | 2 |
| mightywombat | 1 |
I was reading this article : http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20100526/ap_on_go_ca_st_pe/us_interracial_marriage
And it made me wonder how many bees were in Interracial relationships. I am Mexican and FI is Ecuadorian both of us were born and raised in Chicago. I know technically we are not an Interracial couple but OMG there are just so many differences in both of our cultures. Everything from our vocabulary, to our beliefs and traditions. I always thought I would marry a Mexican guy, and to be honest sometimes I wish FI was Mexican. I wish he would get my jokes and my random sayings in spanish.This is almost never an issue since we both speak English almost all the time but still I wish he would undertsand my spanish lol. I really can't picture myself with someone with a waaay different cultural background than me. I can't imagine how frustrating it would be for me to be with someone who didn't get what latin culture is all about.
For those bees in an Interracial relationship: Do you sometimes wish you were both the same race? Does it matter? Does it ever cause issues? Did you ever think you would end up with someone of a different race?
For those bees not in an Interracial relationship: Do you think you could date outside your race? Would it matter?