Post # 1
Writing under a different name because I want to ask something really personal. Have any of you had an issue with your Fiance finishing too fast during sex?
We’ve been intimate for a couple of years with each other but never been with anyone else before. He is a great partner and always willing to try new things and focused on giving me pleasure. However, when we have intercourse, it usually lasts like 5 min, which is really not enough for me.
The relationship is great otherwise, physically and emotionally. We’ve talked about this, but the only conclusion we’ve come to is that maybe it’s because he’s not used to sex and the problem will go away by itself. However, it’s not getting any better and I don’t know what to do 🙁
Post # 3
my boyfriend can be pretty quick sometimes… best advice, less forplay for him and more for you… Then when he thinks he getting close, stop for a little bit and let him help you more… then try again… have him stop a few times until your both ready.
Post # 4
Do you use condoms? If not, maybe give them a try, they can decrease male sensitivity and lead to an ability to have intercourse longer. Also, you could try taking a “time out” when he gets near orgasm, where you provide no stimulation for him and he manually/orally stimulates you until he is less aroused, then start up with intercourse again.
Post # 5
I’ve had this experience with a few previous boyfriends. My few pieces of advice:
1. have him wear a condom. not the thin ones. this will make him less sensetive.
2. have more sex or encourage him to take care of himself on a regular basis. That way the urgency won’t be there. Guys have a limited supply of semen and the more that’s been…expended already the less the need for his body to expend more.
3. Try a ring for him. They go on the shaft of his penis and cut off some of the blood supply which makes him last longer. (some of them vibrate and feel great for the girl).
Post # 6
Thanks guys, this is really helpful advice. We haven’t tried any of these techniques so we definitely will.
I guess I’m also upset that this is even happening in the first place…does it mean there’s something wrong with him or me? Like he’s too weak or something? I mean, as far as I understand (and granted I don’t have much experience), most people don’t have this issue…so why is it such a problem for us?
Post # 7
I think the idea that your problem is rare is probably just from the fact that people don’t talk about it. It’s actually a pretty common issue, and not just for men. Try out some of the ideas mentioned above (I second the ring) and see if that helps!
Post # 8
@SecretNameBee: you have no idea how many men have this issue. LOTS! please dont’ feel like there is something wrong with either of you. there isn’t. everyone’s bodies are different. there is no right or wrong. there is no fault or blame to be places. This is just another one of those quirks we all have and find ways to deal with. Think about all the body issues women have. Some women can’t orgasm, some women have very sensetive nipples, etc. men are equally different and varied. Work with your Fiance to figure out what works for the two of you. And who knows, you might have some fun in the process 🙂
Post # 9
There is nothing wrong with either of you!!!!
He gets excited with you… thats a GREAT thing not a bad thing!
I had this issue with a previous Boyfriend or Best Friend and the best thing for us was him taking care of himself every morning – him getting used to that level of pleasure helps him build a tolerance for it. Stamina will come with time don’t worry!