(Closed) Intimate vs extravagant ?

posted 7 years ago in 20 Something
Post # 3
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

What?! Intimate is the way to go! If your close friends and family are there–isn’t that what matters? Now, if you have lots of close friends and family, it’s a different story.

If you’re okay being financially responsible and scaling back the wedding, I think that’s incredibly wise. Saving, literally, every single stinkin’ dime off a minimum wage job to pay for a $7,000 wedding will become a huge thorn in your side.

Heck, most people I talked to when i got married gave me the advice to go intimate, not big. But DH’s family is big, so we had no choice. In hindsight, there were at least 50 guests I didn’t know (his extended family) and it just bothers me! WHO were those people?! I don’t know. Haven’t seen them in well over a year.

I think you’re doing a wise thing Laughing

Post # 4
Member
3672 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

We realized that intimate was better too late so I say go for it.  We cut our wedding budget in half and now we’re more excited about the wedding.  So I say go for it and do what you think is best, not what others think you should have.  The people that are most important will be there.  We realized when we looked at our larger guest list that half the people would be there purely out of obligation and that’s not what we wanted.

Post # 5
Member
485 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Initmate is great, as long as you can have everyone you want there within the confines of 20 people.  Our Intimate was no less than 75 people… I dont think youd be missing out as long as you can include the people you want…

Post # 6
Member
7300 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

Intimate  is the way to go. I can’t imagine being able to enjoy time with my guests if there were 400 people there.

Post # 8
Member
6572 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

What your planning sounds amazing! My hubby wanted a big fancy wedding, I wanted to elope, we comprimised by having a small (30 person) ceremony and a bigger reception. I loved our ceremony, and I loved that it was just about me and him, not the  millions of people watching.

Post # 9
Member
853 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

If intimate is what you want, go for it. The details don’t matter to me either as long as the people I love are there to share the day with us. And honestly, wouldn’t it cause you more problems to stress about money in the long-run anyway? I think you’d regret going into debt to throw a huge party for everyone if you didn’t want a huge party to begin with. I say do what you want!

Post # 10
Member
459 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I had a small, intimate wedding (35 people), and it was just what I wanted. Everyone there was our close family or friends. We had time to hang out with everyone over the course of the weekend. It was also relatively low-stress to plan for the small number of people. I could see someone regretting not having a big wedding if that was what they wanted to have but couldn’t–but intimate can definitely be great.

Post # 11
Member
9 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@Thefuturemrs: It’s crazy how similar your story is to mine!

I saw go with the intimate wedding. At first I was taken over by the idea of inviting everyone I knew and having a grand wedding but that got deflated when I realised how much it would cost.

A wedding is a union between TWO people. That means it will be meaningful and beautiful no matter where you have it, as long as it’s with the one you love and want to spend your life with. My fiance and I decided to do our ceremony in Vegas and will be having an informal reception when we get back to our home town to which we invited our closest friends and family.

Think about what you want! It’s your wedding! I think in the end you’d regret not doing what you wanted more than you’d regret not going big.

Post # 12
Member
1883 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Never mind my post. Misread the original one-I missed the part where you are going out to dinner!

Post # 13
Member
2304 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

I’d say go for the intimate one. As long as everyone who means the absolute most to you are there, I’m sure you won’t regret avoiding debt and waiting a whole extra year to invite a bunch of people you aren’t even close with to begin with.

Good Luck it seems like you have great organizational skills and you would be able to plan the most beautiful intimate wedding without regret.

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