(Closed) Introduction from me…..advice please :)

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
9611 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2018

definitely talk to your parents, they will be more upset with him later after finding out you guys lied to them for so long. be honest with them about how you feel about each other, say that you have been living together, that you are committed to each other, clear the air with them before getting engaged. he probably wants to develop a good relationship with them first! as for waiting advice, hang out with friends more, get a hobby or something 🙂

Post # 4
Member
4 posts
Wannabee

could you organize a dinner for your parents, your SO and you? maybe if they get to know him now (all of these years later) they will learn to like and respect him? you have to start to build that relationship. i would also confide to your mom that you are planning on marrying this man, so that she knows how serious you are about the relationship.

Post # 6
Member
3220 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

I don’t think you should cater towards all of your parents’ wishes, but if you really want them to approve, have you looked at Mossanite? They don’t need to know it’s not a real diamond?

If it were me, I’d invite them to a courthouse wedding and just make everything official. 

Post # 8
Member
5311 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 2010

@erna:  You are too shy with your BF of nine years to tell him you would say yes if he asked you to marry him?

 

I find that concrning…but tell him you would say yes already! This will hardly be the most difficult conversation you will have over the years! I am rather worried that you cannot seem to talk about marriage in more concrete terms rather than both hinting around it. It is a good idea to talk about it plenty to ensure you have similar expectations and so forth.

 

I would also recommend being honest with your parents. Lying about living together for three years is a secret that is going to come out sometime or later. At your age, it is time to start living your life for YOU, not others expectations.

Post # 9
Member
3220 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

If you’re already talking about houses and weddings, you can talk about engagement rings.  I agree– 9 years is long enough that you should be able to talk about anything!

Next time the subject comes up, tell him you know about some ring options that could work for your situation– it doesn’t have to be difficult if you don’t make it difficult!

Post # 10
Member
532 posts
Busy bee

I agree with PPs! Stop being so shy! You have been together for so long and you want to marry this man, so there are much more difficult conversations to be had in the future. Just show him the moissaniteco website and say “have you ever heard of this?” and let him have a look. Discussing marriage with your SO is not pressuring him into  marrying you. Those are two different things.

Post # 13
Member
145 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I think that you are both adults and should be free to do what you want to do,regardless of the size of the ring. If this is the man you love, and you all are willing to work through life’s ups and downs, as you already have so far living together for 3 years, and dating for 9, then your parents should accpet this for what it is; and respect you for your choices. I cant imaging hiding something from my parents that long!  I know you want your relationship to remain good with your parents; but if they didnt approve of him before, hiding him isnt going to improve their approval rating. Other thoughts– you cannot marry and raise children with your mom & dad; so if he’s the one, speak up, tell him of course you want to married, and enjoy having your relationship in the open. As PP mentioned, this is YOUR life, AND every single day is yours to live, breathe and own. Take ownership of your love, and steer your life in the direction YOU want it to go, not your parents!! *hugs* you can do it!!

Post # 15
Member
9611 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2018

if you feel shy about talking to him about engagement, what are you going to do in a marriage? things need to be talked about, issues come up like children, financing, etc. definitely bring it up asap, subtlety is often lost on guys

The topic ‘Introduction from me…..advice please :)’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors