Post # 1
Bees, I got married a week ago and wanted to share my advice for other introverted Bees in the days leading up to and the big day itself.
First – let me clarify. Introvert is NOT the same as being shy. I’m not shy at all, but I do find too much socialization absolutely exhuasting and it was my big fear going into the wedding. So here’s some things I did that really helped:
– I planned a day to myself a few days before the wedding. My fiance headed out for his bachelor party and I took the day off work and told friends and family who were already in town that I was going to be on my own that day taking care of stuff. In truth – I didn’t do much, but I relaxed and had some time to get my head together.
– I told people when I needed some time/space. I think as introverts sometimes we have to make sure to tell people what we need if we want them to understand. So, for example, the morning of the wedding I was feeling really tense and nervous and my MIL and SIL who are LOVELY people but very social just kept talking to me, and I finally just said “I love you both so much, and please don’t take this personally, but I’m really not up for conversation right now.”
– The day before the wedding I booked myself a massage and mani/pedi – at a different time than other bridal party members.
– I asked a fellow introvert friend to keep an eye on me during the reception and if I started to look overwhelmed, come pull me out of the room/conversation. We actually didn’t need this but I felt better knowing she was looking out for me.
– During the reception my fiance and I stepped outside for a minute and just took a second to breathe.
Really, it went well. I think the key is just explaining to people what you need. Because I’ll get really cranky and overwhelmed if I’m overstimulated socially. But remember these people love you and will understand your quirks – just tell them. 🙂
Post # 2
Moraz: Thank you for taking the time to write this, I’m going to bookmark this for my wedding next year. I’ve been gathering some ideas and saving them to deal with my own introversion. Congratulations on your wedding!
Post # 3
where was this for my wedding? Lol
I am just like this. I wake up at 5:30 just to have an extra hour of alone time in the mornings and so my workouts can be quiet as well. I love people and being with my family but extroverts don’t understand the need for alone time to regroup and how stressed one can get from large groups and tiring lists of things to do such as weddings
Post # 4
Moraz: Thank you SO much for writing this. I’m going to save it so I have it on hand for next year when I get married. Your advice made a lot of sense and the way you broke it down so it will be easy to follow is amazing. I got engaged two years ago and since then a day hasn’t gone by without me thinking about how and what I was going to do to handle my anxiety. Now that I have a list of guidelines to follow, I can finally breathe a sigh of relief. THANK YOU! YOU ARE A LIFE SAVER AND A WEDDING ADVICE GIVING ANGEL FROM HEAVEN!!!
Post # 5
aww thank you guys 🙂
I know we’re kind of a rare breed – we just need a little special care and feeding 🙂
Post # 6
What a helpful post! I’d also add that for me at least, having a smaller wedding with mainly people we are close to really helped with not feeling overwhelmed. We also had it during the day. I really don’t think I could have kept up with being the center of attention with a long reception that went until midnight. I’m usually ok attending weddings like that, because I can slip off for some air as needed, but at your own wedding it’s a little harder to do that. We were back in our hotel room by around 6 pm and got to actually spend quality time together on our wedding day before crashing at like 10pm after being up early and having to be “on” all day.
Good luck to all the other introvert brides. You can do it!
Post # 7
“Really, it went well. I think the key is just explaining to people what you need. […] But remember these people love you and will understand your quirks – just tell them.”
This is so true, and I think it can apply to a lot of other wedding related things and just life in general. As long as you ask, people are always willing to help you.
I’m glad the day went so well for you. Congratulations to you and your husband!
Post # 8
Moraz: Thanks for this. I am really dreading the socializing on the wedding day.