(Closed) Invitation to Guest who isn’t coming–Specific Case

posted 9 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
225 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I have friends who tell me they can’t make it to the wedding after receiving the Save the Date. I still sent the invitation, just because it’s still always nice to receive it – and see it.

I was invited to a weddng once, but never got an invitation (I gave a verbal RSVP), and when the date neared, I couldn’t make and notified them, and they never gave me an invitation. I actually really wanted to still receive one eventhough I knew I couldn’t make it. Kinda makes me wonder if I was *really* invited or not, you know?

Not sure about the European thing, but if they get confused, I’m sure they’ll ask and it’ll sort itself out. It’s better than not sending and then inadvertently hurting someone. 

Post # 4
Member
2820 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

I think that since he’s already told you he can’t come, you don’t need to send him one. If you want, you can (though I would DEFINITELY include a note explaining that you know he might come, but you thought he might like an invite anyways)…but the only people I would do that with would be those who would want to save the invite (mothers, grandmothers, etc.).

Post # 5
Member
1037 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010 - Carlouel Yacht Club

I like the idea of still sending him an invitation but including a note with it! Especially since there was a present involved, I just would think it would be nice to send an invite regardless!

Post # 6
Member
1022 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I would still send an invite, especially since they gave you a gift. 

Post # 7
Member
340 posts
Helper bee

Yeah, I agree that an invite would still be super nice of you.

Post # 8
Member
289 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I had 3 people who definitely could not come but I sent the invitation anyway. While there were a few people who ended up getting a wedding invitation that did not originally get a save-the-date, there was no one that got a save-the-date that did not get an invitation.

Post # 9
Member
3332 posts
Sugar bee

I think, although it’s not necessary, it might be a nice gesture to send him an invitation.  Like other people suggested, you could just include a note acknowledging that you know he won’t be able to make it, but that you wanted to include them.

Post # 10
Member
407 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

i would send the invite (in full) and attach a note saying that you know he can’t make it, but you wanted to let him enjoy the invitation that you lovingly created!

Post # 11
Member
1490 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

Send the invitation with an attached note expressing your regrets again that he couldn’t make it. It’s always nice to see wedding invitations and it will make them feel truly invited and appreciated.

Post # 12
Member
4567 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I’d send it and include a note saying you’re sorry her can’t make it! It’s always nice to feel included!

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