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Well if I understand correctly, you are having the actual wedding in Knoxville, but your parents are having a seocnd reception after you honeymoon for family back home, in your hometown. How big is the knoxville affair? How big would the family reception be? How far away from each other are they? If your actual recpetion is at your home, is your parents reception more of a fancier affair?
My first reaction would be to not invite the family to both, maybe just to your parents reception. I guess I would feel like I'm being asked to celebrate a wedding twice and give two gifts. (But I guess I had a lot of questions for you that might influence that.)
If you send both, I would send the family members an insert letting them know that for anyone finding it difficult to come to the wedding there will be a reception at you hometown on such and such a date. And to simply reply to whichever one they'd prefer to go to. My guess is most of them would go to the one closer to them.
Honestly, I've never been involved with a situation like this. So I'm just giving my two cents.
We're doing something similar - but our ceremony/reception is smaller and then we're inviting everyone to the other reception. What we ended up doing was formal invites for the ceremony/reception and postcard invites for the second one. We worded the second one as our "Wedding Celebration" instead of a reception. We did save the dates for both, and are just making sure we tell the folks who are invited to the first that they are certainly welcome (but not expected/required) at the second.
Cheesy,
we're doing something similar.
See my post here for the very detailed, hopefully not too confusing response.
LatteLove -- Close. Thing is, we want to give people the option. In normal, everyday non-invite words, we'd say, "We're getting married on May 24 in Knoxville, TN, with reception to follow under the stars. We're also celebrating our marriage at a reception on July XX in Las Cruces, NM. Will you join us for either or both?"
Adding to the complications, my parents will host the hometown reception, while we're hosting the Knoxville reception. So, while we're similar to Avo's situation, we're a little different: the Avo's invited people to one or the other; we're inviting everyone to everything and letting them tell us what they prefer.
Maybe "MyName and HisName will be married on May 23, 2009 at our home in Knoxville, TN. Wedding celebrations will be held immediately following the ceremony, under the stars, and also on July XX in Las Cruces, NM."??
Sorry, my explanation wasn't quite clear...but we have about 50 people we're inviting to both. The announcement won't go into both. For those invited to both, we're including a tiny envelope with a brief California reception invitation, along with a postcard reply card that will get sent to FMIL because she is planning it.
So invitation will include:
Chicago wedding/reception invitation
directions, accomodations, etc
RSVP postcard for Chicago wedding addressed to me
Cali reception invite (with directions on the back side)
RSVP postcard for cali reception addressed to FMIL^in a separate enveleope, but still in the large invitation envelope, a la the budget disney bride (see the attached photo)
Our Cali reception invite will be informal, post card size and say something like this:
Please join us as we celebrate our marriage at a dinner party in XX, California on Saturday XX July, 8pm.
The easiest way I can think of is just to put an insert with the hometown reception info like that, and make your intentions more clear on the reply card. It's going to be pricier to have two reply cards...but they can both be postcards (it will be easier for me to have the cali reception reply cards go to FMIL so I'm not worried about getting her the guest lists while we are on our honeymoon.)
ie.
Will be attending Knoxville ceremony and reception _____
Will be attending hometown wedding celebration______
We would love to see you at either or both!
DIY_Wedding_invitation_2_receptions.jpg (102.6 KB, 416 downloads) 3 years old 
I didn't make it through all of te comments above, so I apologize if I'm repeating something that was already said.
A friend recently had this exact situation. They simply printed two response cards. For the guests who would only attend the west coast ceremony/reception, their response card was the standard "yes/no & food choice."
For the guests who were also from their hometown, or those family members that might fly in for the hometown shindig, they printed another response card. That response card said something along the lines of "Yes/No for ceremony & reception, plus food choice." (It was obviously written out better.) And they had a second line below all of that that said "Yes/No for hometown shindig" (again, written better). The hometown thing was a much smaller, low key bbq type thing, so they didn't have to ask about food choices. So really, it was just the standard response card with a second line at the bottom.
Your other option would be to print one card for the regular ceremony/reception response. and then a second card for the hometown celebration-- for those that you are inviting to your hometown celebration, you could just add in the second card and mention that you'd like both response cards back in the same envelope (or even stuff that little envelope with both, or put both under the flap).
DSC00119.JPG (81.1 KB, 364 downloads) 2 years old DSC00112.JPG (90 KB, 128 downloads) 2 years old DSC00108.JPG (75.5 KB, 46 downloads) 2 years old DSC00107.JPG (53.6 KB, 67 downloads) 2 years old My fiance and his family live in Virginia and my family and I live in Texas. We both have friends and family from all over the US. We are having a black tie wedding and reception in Virginia and a very very casual (beers, burgers, and brisket) celebration in Texas. Everyone who was invited to the wedding reception I also gave them the option of going to the Texas celebration. Especially if they went to our wedding website, I didn't want anyone to feel left out. My reception cards said:
Reception immediately to follow at the reception location.
If you are unable to attend, a second, casual celebration will be held in Texas at this time and place. Directions are available to both at our website. (since directions to two events wouldn't fit on the card) We would be honored to see you at either or both.
My RSVP cards said:
Will be attending ceremony and reception in Virginia
Will be attending celebration in Texas
Will not be attending
For people at my church, sorority, and college friends, I'm probably going to give them wedding celebration invitations.
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I'll post about my invites soon, but I'm stuck on wording. We're having a tented reception following our ceremony at our home here in Knoxville, then my parents are hosting a reception about a month later in my hometown. The plan is to invite everyone to the Knoxville shindig, and my family to the hometown reception as well, giving them each the choice of locations.
I'll do one invite for the non-hometown people, but how do I word the invite that includes options for either reception?
Also, since we're getting married on Memorial Day weekend, is it too soon to send out invitations in February?
Thanks!!