Weddingbee boards

You could always just say, "I want the invite very traditional, and it is tradition that the with the bride's parents hosting, it is their names on the invite."

Otherwise, if you wanted to keep them happy, you could do like I did for mine which said:

Mr and Mrs Bride's Parents request the honor of your presence at the marriage of their daughter Bride's name to Groom's name, son of Mr and Mrs Groom's Parents.

That way is clear that the bride's parents are hosting, but also mentiond the groom's parents.

If it helps, my sister and I both did our wedding invitations with wording like rosychicklet's suggestion.  Neither of our husband's families contributed a nickel - in her case, she and her husband bought her MIL's plane tickets, and in our case, we paid for my MIL's hotel room.  It actually is a case, for us, of them just not having the money - which maybe lowers the resentment factor, but introduces a bunch of other issues (trust me on this).

Anyway, that's what I recommend.  There is no rule of etiquette that says that you don't mention the groom's parents.  You should include them only as shown by rosychicklet, unless they are co-hosting - in other words, their names don't go at the top, along with your parents, unless they are contributing.  But including their names after the groom's name does keep them from feeling purposely excluded, while also making it clear that all they contributed was the groom.

You are right about not listing them, as if they've contributed money, when they haven't.   Furthermore, you shouldn't say anything to them.  Your FI should do the talking.  If you are OK with the wordng that Rosy suggested, (and the FIL's are happy too) go for it.  Everyone is a winner.  But if they don't think that's good enough, I would make sure Fi tells them how invitations are traditionally worded, and why they aren't listed as if they're hosting the party.

I agree with the suggestions above, however, "hosting" and "paying" for a wedding are two different things. It is always a blessing when people contribute to the costs out of the goodness of their hearts. However, hosting can have multiple meanings -- planning the wedding, throwing the festivities for you, etc. Most importantly "hosting" - to me - refers to unconditional support and love not only in your engagement but in your lives. Do you feel as if this is an attribute deserving of an invitation recognition?

I like some of the suggestions above "Together with their parents...", etc. However if you are adament that your parents name be on the invites, and FIL's names not, perhaps you could say something like, "We'd like to the traditional invitation with the bride's parents hosting the event, but you will definitely be recognized in the programs at the cermony and/or introduced at the reception" (That is, assuming you are doing a program or introducing parents at the reception, lol)

Did I make sense?

I agree with everyone else, I think if you put "Mr & Mrs Blah and Mr & Mrs Blah" request the pleasure of your company....etc that it implies that both parents are hosting the wedding.  I put my FI's parents names on the invitation for 2 reasons. 1, they are helping with the bar and they are throwing the rehearsal dinner, brunch, etc.  2, I am putting their names because I want to.  My invitations say:

"Mr & Mrs Brides Parents request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter, Bride, to Groom, son of Mr & Mrs Grooms Parents."