Invitation wording … To include "Together with their Parents" or not

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
3756 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

Well, technically your parents are giving you the use of their home, which is a contribution although perhaps not financially. But as a compromise to not putting their names at the top, put that piece about The Residence of x & y. That’s probably what I would do.

Post # 4
6446 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

To me- those names at the top “give credit” to those who are hosting. In this case I would certainly say your parents are hosting your guests as the wedding is at their house. 

Post # 5
6664 posts
Bee Keeper

It is incorrect that hosting and bill paying must be connected.  Sometimes they are, but it is not a requirement.  To me, the support, love, and resources of a lifetime are enough to warrant the honor if a couple is  so moved.  

Post # 6
6953 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

To me, the support, love, and resources of a lifetime are enough to warrant the honor if a couple is  so moved.  

^ This pretty much. I always find it a tiny bit sad when the couple doesn’t include their parents on the invite and they are on good terms.

Post # 7
47 posts
  • Wedding: June 2014

I’m leaving that off entirely on the few invites I send out. So many invites I see are talking about joining of families and such. Our families have never even met! So I definitely think it’s not a requirement to include mention of parents on invites.

Post # 10
650 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@see_22:  I think including their names on the location info is nice, and fine. 

We are not planning to include host info on the invitation (AKA along the lines of “the honor of your presence is requested for the marriage of…” Instead of a host line, plus invitation line. I took it from a Martha Stewart example, so I feel like it’s ok etiquette wise. My parents are paying for the ceremony and his the rehearsal dinner, but we are paying the bulk, at least 90%… And it just felt like a host line would make someone feel bad. 

Post # 11
112 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

You have to do what you feel is right. If it feels wrong to “falsely” credit them with hosting, leave their names off. If this will cause a huge fight with your families, it’s not worth it. Trust me – there is enough drama that goes down with wedding planning, you don’t need another fight or issue to stress about. If you think your parents won’t be offended, then do it the way you had planned.

Post # 12
7630 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

I don’t automatically assume the parents contribute if they’re listed. Plus, it sounds like your parents are contributing their home.

If you feel uncomfortable you could always say “together with their families” so they’re there but not explicitly listed.

Post # 13
1525 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I think the use of the house is a contribution.  I am so very sorry you mention that the lack of a financial support is a sore spot.  Some parents may not have the money to help, and I personally do not think parents should raid their retirement money or college savings for a younger sibling to help with a wedding.   Your parents providing use of the house is to me indicative of support of the wedding and marriage.  I think you should reconsider using their house if you do not regard it as a contribution.


 I have seen the following on invites




Mr and Mrs Brides Parents


request the blah blah blah


at the marriage of


their daughter








the son of Mr and Mrs Grooms Parents




This implies to me that the brides parents are hosting, but is respectful to grooms parents.


Post # 14
11588 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I think you should do whatever you really want to do.  Either way would be fine to do.  If it were me, I would include parent’s names because my parents were giving the use of their home, but it’s your call!

Post # 15
1627 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Are your parents charging you a fee to use their home? If not, I would consider that a contribution. However, you don’t have to include them on the invite if you don’t want to. Instead of “the residence of John and Mary Williams”  you could write “the Williams’ Home”  or “the Williams Residence.”


@juanita.kelly.9:  or some parents who have the extra money (wouldn’t effect retirement or other kid’s collegefunds etc) just don’t want to pay for a wedding. It’s their choice.

Post # 16
1463 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I was in my 20s the first time I married and we had no financial help from any of our parents.  We still had “together with their parents” because we love them and they raised us. 

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