(Closed) Invitations….FI thinks I’m being a bridezilla!

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1238 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

I wouldn’t say that you are bridezilla… but you may want to take a deep breath.  The whole wedding planning thing can be very stressful, and if you let every situation like this get to you then you will become a walking stress case!  Trust me– I did it!  Keep in mind that most invitation turn around times are over 4 weeks – -it took 5 weeks to get mine.  So, you are still on schedule, right?  Look on the bright side! 

Post # 4
Member
5988 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

Yikes…that’s close timing.  I hope you get them in time!

Question – were you being mean to your Fi?  You didn’t mention anything mean you did to him here (but I often conveniently leave that part out too…:)

Based on what you’ve said I don’t think your Fi did anything wrong – it sounds like he did everything you asked of him.  The printer was the one that was non responsive (you get what you pay for), not your Fi, so go easy on him. 

Having things be up in the air or get thrown off schedule really stresses me out too.  I always have to remind myself (and don’t always do such an admirable job) to not snap on people because I’m not handeling the pressure well.  Ultimately it wont help.  If you don’t get them on time it SUCKS (especially because I’m sure that putting them together with your family would be a speical moment) but worse things could happen and they’ll still get done one way or another.

Post # 6
Member
2434 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

I think you might have overreacted a little, but I’ve been there!  Wedding planning means emotions run high.  Apologize for being short with him and tell him that it wasn’t fair for you to freak out and take it out on him.

Then next time there’s a bump in the road try to keep it in perspective.

Glad you finally got a response and my fingers are crossed that they will be in the mail on Monday without further hassle!

Post # 7
Member
5988 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

Well, I think Bridezilla is uncalled for for sure.  For goodness sakes, you were just trying to get something done!

God, I hate that term.  Honestly, I am the type to stess out about details whether it’s a wedding or not!  Why do we all of a sudden have to label women in such a demeaning way!?!

Post # 8
Member
2433 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

Take a deep breath. I would recommend taking an evening to do something nice together with no wedding planning or wedding discussion involved. I recently ran into an issue with my fiance after trying to just squeeze too much wedding stuff into one week. When I suggested spending the little free time we did have together going to register at another store, he gently reminded me that he would like to spend some time with his fiance with no wedding talk involved.

Remember to listen to your fiance.. most guys are not quite into wedding planning the same way the brides are, so the minor details are usually seen as minimally important. Take a minute to see it from his perspective and enjoy the fact that everything turned out alright.

I don’t think you’re being a bridezilla, however. I think the wedding stress just overwhelmed you for a bit (like it has for a majority of the rest of us!).

Post # 10
Member
513 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

Wow- What an ordeal! I bet your fh is sitting there saying to himself silently ‘as if this invite thing couldn’t get any worse… I am going to have to tell her they weren’t printed right… <sigh>!’

I don’t even know what I would have done if I were in your shoes- I might have burst into tears quite frankly…. even though they are just invites. But the whole story leading up to it, and the follow up- not to mention the marriage session!!!! Ugh. 

I think you deserve a brownie point for chillness. =o)

Post # 11
Member
48 posts
Newbee

Was that the printer’s mistake or your FI? If it was the printer’s fault, you may either ask for a refund or free reprints. If it was your FI’s fault, you may want to talk to your printer and ask nicely if he can help you fast-forward your invites. This time you ask for proofs and do the follow-ups yourself.

ALWAYS, always ask for contract and proofs. This saves lots of time, money and frustration in the end.

Keep your cool. This is maybe a sign of your FI’s working ethics. Can you deal with this or you want to change this? Whatever the outcome, learn from this then move on.

 

Post # 12
Member
7054 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

I think he just simply used a buzzword that’s a sign of the times..bridezilla. He probably felt pressured somehow (not sure how though..just phone calls were made mind you) and used the catchphrase to negatively describe any bride these days.  I personally think you deserve the medal of honor for behaving so nicely after they messed up over 200 bucks of invites.  A bridezilla would walk to the printer, ask to see the manager, and hit him with her purse!    

Maybe he should be shown the show "bridezillas" so he can understand how he has such a wonderful woman with him who is anything but a bridezilla!  That should stop his useage of the silly "buzzword".

When you talk to guys, for some crazy reason, they respond when we leave emotions out of stuff and tasks are discussed in a business manner.  I once read this in a book and when I have to do things with T and I get frustrated, I discuss the task at hand and keep my emotions in check and he always "gets it".  I think a little communication about "work" (invites) is all that’s needed.  Explain that it will be more work for both of you if the printers do not get their job completed in a reasonable time frame.  It seems men are more task oriented than we are, and get completely flustered sometimes when we respond with emotions.  Some of them just have a hard time dealing with that.

Post # 14
Member
126 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

Not knowing is the worst thing for someone planning their wedding.  We had our engagement pics taken 3 weeks ago and we still haven’t heard back from them.  We are waiting for them so we can send some along with our invitations that we are sending overseas since some of the relatives have never met us.  I’ve even emailed my photographer and asked if maybe he can send just a couple so we can get the invites sent.  Still no answer….it IS frustrating!!! 

 

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