Invite my Bridesmaid's HORRIBLE fiance, who doesn't even like me?

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
5697 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

I don’t even have to read the post to say yup. Sorry, they’re engaged.

Post # 4
22124 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2011

Invite him. You will be too busy and too distracted by all the love and joy on your wedding day to even notice him. 🙂

Post # 5
5781 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

How do you tell Kim that Matt isn’t invited? Simple: you don’t. He may be the world’s biggest douchebag but he’s still engaged to your bridesmaid so he makes the guest list, period. It sucks, but it’s the way it is.

Post # 6
1399 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@Daisy627:  I think if you don’t invite Matt, you run the rist of breaking up your friendship with Kim.  She will probably not attend your wedding if you don’t invite her fiance.  Personally, I would grin and bear it.  UNLESS, you feel that the sacrifice of losing Kim as a friend is worth it.  Which, TBH, could be true in some cases.

Post # 7
3806 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@MsJ2theZ:  +1

and if he hates you so much, he may not even come. i had to invite my half-sister’s boyfriend who i despise. he declined and i was happy about that. 

Post # 8
2114 posts
Buzzing bee

@Daisy627:  If he dislikes you and your friends that much, he might not even want to come. You dont HAVE to invite him, but she should get a plus one.

Post # 9
342 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

You have to extend an invite to him, unfortunately.  If I were in your position I’d be like “And he doesn’t have to come if he doesn’t want to since it’s clear he doesn’t like me.”  friendship be damned!

Post # 10
2915 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Wynn Las Vegas

You absolutely should invite him. If he dislikes you so much, then he might not even come.

Post # 11
214 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2005

@Daisy627:  I can 100% sympathize. Totally. This is the exact same situation I’m in. 

I even posted about it on here a few days ago and the response was overwhelmingly that I needed to invite my bridesmaids husband even though I hate him. and I did it. It sucks and I’m still not happy with it but I just had to suck it up and do it. 

So, yes you need to bite the bullet and invite the creep. I know it stinks (oh, how I know it stinks) but it is the right thing to do. 

But, in the end you will have been the better person, followed the rules of etiquette and potentially saved a friendship.

I hope he chooses to stay home though! 

Post # 12
2576 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013



+1 to both.

I had to invite DH’s friend and his wife who HATES me to our wedding. They both declined, which was a relief. Since your friend is BM, I see her showing up, but the FI staying home. Good luck, OP.

Post # 13
4483 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

Etiquette dictates that an engaged couple be invited together. 

Post # 14
2565 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Yes, you have to invite him.  No matter the reasons you two don’t like each other, he is engaged to your friend and bridesmaid so they are invited together.

Post # 15
1266 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

I have to agree with PPs.  You need to invite him.  I know it sucks, but he’s your bridesmaid’s fiance, plus not inviting him would only make things worse.

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