Post # 1
I know this might seem like I’m getting ahead of things since I’m not quite engaged yet, but I just had to wonder…
My sister and I have never been close. We’ve hated each other since the beginning and were forced into competition with each other (same activities, same school events, etc.) which I believe exacerbated the issue. She is the more slender, prettier version of me who rarely got in trouble as a child, being asked out to prom by my classmates whereas I never had a date and getting her claws in my friends which suddenly alienated me for my sister. In recent years she’s taken to having a condescending attitude whenever she talks to me that makes me only tolerate her in small, spaced doses.
To put it simply: She wouldn’t mind stealing the show at someone else’s wedding. It could be wearing an outrageous white dress or drawing the guests’ attention some other way.
Is it rude to not invite her? I would invite my parents, and maybe my aunts/uncles and cousins out of politeness (family isn’t close, but at least we’re civil and I wouldn’t mind them at my wedding). I’m going to come right out and say that I’m afraid of receiving snarky comments, or her outright stealing the show on my special day. I don’t consider myself high maintenance, but for one day in my life, I would really like people to say that I looked beautiful, instead of focusing on my sister for whatever reason – be it her antics, or whatnot.
Post # 2
An interesting sister. Sisters always like that. I understand you. I suggest you to invite her, but tell her your worries and tell her to behave in the way you like. I am sure she will understand. It is your day.
Post # 3
Do u really think she’d do that? I mean, that takes serious balls. I would also be very surprised to hear of a family and friends ignoring a bride and fawning over her sister… Maybe u and ur sister need to have a heart to heart about your issues. Not inviting her would probably cause more problems. I don’t always get along with my sister but I’d be so heartbroken if she didn’t invite me
Post # 4
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
Sister or dragon? You’re the bride, nobody can show you up. Unless you invite a ton of people who don’t know you and your sister wears a white dress and is mistaken for the bride. Family is family, you should always invite immediate family unless she is truly a dragon that might steal your husband.
Post # 5
You don’t have to invite anybody who you don’t think will be truly there, to help you celebrate your day, or whose presence might make you miserable. Some brides/groom don’t even invite their own parents.
My daughter and her FH aren’t inviting an uncle/aunt, from each side (25% of all uncles/aunts). There’s been drama from them, in the past , and they are not going to risk it, and let them effect the happiness of their day.
Post # 6
chevaldame: I have a very similar sister. Took me a long time to realize that I could never “win” by trying to have a comeback to her nasty comments. How much better my life became once I realized that, even though she was a relative, I could interact with her as little as possible.
She invited me to her wedding years ago, even though our relationship was at its lowest point. I had no role other than guest. When I went through the receiving line, I mentioned to one of the bridesmaids that I was the brides’s sister. She looked at me in confusion and explained that she was not the bride’s sister. “I know. I am,” was my reply. Talk about awkward.
Last year, I invited her to my wedding. She’s a little more mature now (a little bit) and even sent me an email complimenting me.
You do not have to invite her. (You might get flak from other family members.) If you do, seat her far away from you.
Incidentally, my husband has a brother he calls his “ex-brother” and he did not invite him to the wedding.