Post # 1
I am new to the site but I have an issue that has been coming up throughout my planning. I have a few friends from high school that I no longer see on a regular basis or even talk to besides when I see them and am wondering do I have to invite them to the reception? We are having a small reception with only our close friends and family and have a limit of 80 for our reception room we are already having issues with family and have had to say no to many that are not immediate family. Also a couple of these high school friends have asked me outright if they are invited to the wedding (this was right after I got engaged) I wasn’t really thinking properly and hadn’t even started planning or realising how much it was going to cost and so I said yes, if I hadn’t said this I wouldn’t have invited them at all. So am I able to invite these people just to our ceremony which is in a different place and not to the reception? If I can how do I even do this, do I send them a save the date, invitation?
Thanks in advance ladies!
Post # 3
When you invite someone only to the ceremony, you’re telling them that they’re good enough to watch you get married, but not good enough for you to feed them and celebrate with them. If these girls bring it up with you again, I would tell them that unfortunately you’re keeping the wedding to family only and that your venue is very small.
Post # 4
@cmbr: Agree with what she said^^!
Post # 5
@cmbr: Sorry meant for OP I’m trigger happy:)
Post # 8
@jandj2014: I’ve had to tell quite a few different people that I’m not going to be able to invite them after it was implied that they were invited when I first got engaged over a year ago. When they asked I just explained that we are keeping the wedding very small (50 max and that’s basically only family) for personal reasons. A couple pushed and I explained that our budget is very tight. It sucks and I wish I could invite everyone, but it’s just not feasible. However, we are opening up our home after the ceremony and reception for anyone who wants to stop by.
Post # 9
I think it’s so rude for people to ask/hint/push for wedding invitations. It puts hosts/hostesses in awkward positions.
Thus, I think it’s perfectly fair to simply tell these people that you regret being unable to invite them since you and your FI have decided to have a very small wedding with close family. They asked for it.
I do not think it’s okay to invite people to one portion of the wedding and not the other. Ditto all reasons listed by PPs.
Post # 10
I don’t think it’s a problem to invite people only to the ceremony. To be quite honest, I would like more people at the actual ceremony than at the reception. While the reception is the party, I do only want people I’m very close with there. I would feel more comfortable that way. But, my fiance didn’t want a closed reception and that’s something I was willing to compromise on.
Post # 11
- Wedding: June 2014 - The Millennium Center
Honestly, when they asked if they were invited, they were probably not referring to the actual ceremony, but the reception. I wouldn’t invite them, and if they ask explain you had to keep your budget low.