Post # 1
I would really love some suggestions on wording for wedding invitations…. instead of having a gift list, we will have a honeymoon fund, but all i can find is rather long poems to get this point across! just something simple would be good. 🙂
Post # 3
@springwed8: I cannot believe I am writing this, as I despise this notion that newlyweds are sufficiently entitled to expect gifts that they can shamelessly tell their guests what gifts they want, but I love the fact that you have enough good taste to recognize that long rhyming circumlocutions do not improve the situation in the least.
On a traditional invitation to any formal event, the invitation proper goes in the centre of the card:
“Ms Spring Wed
requests the pleasure of the company of
Mr and Mrs Guest
at her wedding to
Mr Handsome Guy
at First Baptist Church
on Saturday the first of September
at two o’clock
with reception to follow at Main Street Legion Hall
at half after six o’clock”
Additional information and instructions go in the lower right and left corners. For example in the left corner (nowadays),
“The favour of a reply is requested
and in the right corner, explanations about dress code and whether there will be dancing or will not be supper or other extraneous information, such as:
“In honour of Miss Famous Author
So if you want to be discreet and formal without giving up on your plans for a guest-funded honeymoon, why not simply put the link to your honeyfund website, or a simple statement, down in the right corner:
“Semi-formal dress requested
gifts requested via http://www.honefund.link“
Now I am going to go slap my own wrist, and wonder what I am going to say when one of my awful nephews asks my advice on how to belch politely in public.
Post # 4
@aspasia475: I LOVE YOUR COMMENTS, ASPASIA!!!!!!
(Sorry for shouting, I was momentarily overcome. I shall return to behaving decorously in short order.)
Post # 5
@aspasia475: Honestly I felt the same way! I am pretty against asking for or expecting gifts in any way. That’s just me. But for some reason something about this post made me want to think up a reasonable and thoughtful answer. Right on OP!!
This above suggestion is great I think.
Maybe our minds are expanding?!
Post # 6
It is generally considered rude to put registry information on a wedding invitation. Instead, consider making a wedding website with information about the event, and you can include a link to your honeymoon registry in the “Registries” section. Also, some honeymoon registry websites have wording suggestions (I know travelersjoy.com lets you view other registries to get wording ideas.)
Post # 7
@springwed8: I know you are asking about wording but I just wanted to tell you that when I receive a wedding invitation that mentions gifts of any sort (money, registries, gift cards ect) I think it is incredibly tacky. Of course I always bring a gift (and I usually ask the bride or a family member what the couple would like to receive) but I do not feel that this should be on an invitation at all. However, I do realize that if you do not put it on then you might get gifts when you seem to want cash. I just told word of mouth through our parents and bridal party that we would prefer cash and almost everyone did this anyway without having to write it anywhere.
Post # 8
I second previous 2 posts above me. Typically registry stuff is left off the wedding invitation, for etiquette reasons. My registry info was spread predominately through word of mouth, but my MOH did put a little blurb on my shower invitation, which is considered ok.
Post # 9
@happybunny: Thanks for your comments, I have to say….all of you have made me see this in a whole new light! every wedding i have been to has had blurb on the invitations about gifts, so i considered it the done thing.
We don;t want any material gifts….as some of you have said…it should not be considered a ‘right’ just because you’re getting married. we have just moved to a very small house and are actively trying to reduce the amount of stuff we have. at the same time, we also don;t expect our guests to fund our honeymoon, just a contribution should they wish.
perhaps the word of mouth approach is best…
Post # 10
@aspasia475: Also love this idea, discreet and to the point. thanks for sharing your views 🙂
Post # 11
We know it’s not traditional
It’s not the way it’s done
But instead of a wedding list
We’d like a bit of sun.
Please do not think of us as rude
Please do not take offence
We do not want to upset you
That’s not the way it’s meant.
We’ve lived together quite a while
And all the bills are paid
We’ve got our plates, our pots and pans
Our plans have all been made.
So if you’d like to give a gift
To help us celebrate
Some money for a honeymoon
We would appreciate
This is the poem we used and everyone LOVED it!!! Lots of compliments. We put it on our wedding website that was included in the invitations. We only told people if they asked if we were registered anywhere, when they asked we sent them the poem. We registered at flight center too if people didn’t want to give cash this provides an option. I agree registry info should not be included in the invite but can be provided when people ask or put on your website 🙂
Post # 12
On ours it will say:
“Please do not feel obligated to buy us a gift – we really appreciate you using annual leave and travelling to Brighton for our wedding. However, for those who have asked, we have created a gift registry for our honeymoon to Walt Disney World at: http://www.honeyfund.com/blablabla“
ETA: it’s really strange, but here in the UK you are expected to have a gift registry and if you don’t it’s considered quite rude because how on earth are the guests supposed to get you something you genuinely want or need? there’s an assumption that everyone has a gift list here and no one is ever offended.
Post # 13
@lookingglass: Ah, that would be why i was confused about all the comments around not having registry on invites…. i am also based in the UK!
Post # 14
@springwed8: haha, i think we’re definitely a bit more lax about etiquette over here.
i find it funny that in the USA it’s rude to ask for gifts, but not rude to ask BM’s to pay for their dresses/makeup etc?
each country to their own I guess!
Post # 15
@lookingglass: I agree with you. I’m in the US and don’t understand how the hell we’re supposed to know what to get the couple if we don’t know where they’re registered. If you read a lot of the comments on this forum in general, it’s like you’re supposed to register, but keep it totally secret and hope that SOMEONE will find where you’re registered, and then if they don’t bring you a gift, they’re rude. Doesn’t make any sense to me.
FWIW, our registry is on our wedding website. No mention on or in with the invitations, just a page on our website with a link to where we’re registered. I’ve also told a few people who have asked already.
Post # 16
@lookingglass: yeah lol. here i think most brides count the bridesmaid dresses, etc into their budget so BMs don’t really have to pay for them. i agree that word of mouth about gifts is best though