Post # 1
I’m in law school and I’m getting married in September. I was talking with a school friend about who from school to invite to the wedding, and she expressed surprise that I didn’t plan on inviting a professor who has been particularly involved in my school life (essentially serving as a mentor — she’s my advisor for my journal comment, I’m in a couple of her classes, I worked for her as a research assistant over the summer, and she’s been helping me figure out career stuff). We’ve seen each other outside of school a little, chat about personal lives (my wedding, her kids, etc) and in a world-where-it-wasn’t-weird, I might want her there.
But, I think it is weird. I’m still in school (and I will be in my final year of school when I get married) and I feel like there’s a line there because of that. But I was surprised that my friend was surprised that I didn’t plan on inviting my prof. Do people do that? Is that less weird than I think it is?
Post # 3
I am a college professor and yes, I have been invited to several student weddings and I usually attend. It is not like I expect to be invited, but it is nice.
Post # 4
I would think that you should. I asked my husband that is currently in law school and has a professor like that. He was her research assistant and she was the advisor on his note. He said yes he would invite her. I invited my academic advisor and his wife who was also a professor in the same department. They had a great time. I just put them at the table with people they knew that were my friends from school.
Post # 5
@hgwells: I invited two of my professors, my advisor and one of my dissertation committee members. I am quite close with them, many dinners out together, I’ve been to their houses, know their families, etc. It was not weird at all for them to be there, I would have missed their presence if they didn’t attend. If you aren’t comfortable with it, no need to invite her.
Post # 6
@hgwells: I don’t think it’s weird at all. If you have a good relationship with your professor, I say invite her if you want. That being said, you are not obligated to invite her either. For what it’s worth, my husband is a professor and has experienced both situations. He says it’s really nice to be invited, but he never expects to be or thinks he ever “should” be. Basically, do what you want to with the situation.
Post # 7
@hgwells: I think you can if you want but if you’re uncomfortable then don’t. Personally I wouldn’t be comfortable with it (and didn’t invite any coworkers) because I like to keep my personal and professional lives separate at least this early in my career.
Post # 8
I think it’s completely fine if you want to invite her, but not something where you need to feel obligated to invite her if you’re not comfortable with it.
Post # 9
I am not 100% sure if I will invite one of my law professors (maybe just one) but I am definitely inviting one professor from college and the librarian that worked in my k-12. I think it is nice – but I am a couple years out from law school.
Post # 10
@WaitingDogMama: Do you think law school is different from regular college/grad school in that respect? I know it’s not unusal to invite grad school professors, but I worry a little that, because law school is so formal, relatively speaking, inviting her might cross some sort of line.
In an ideal world, I’d have her there, so I’ll probably invite her. Just don’t want to be offensive or anything in doing so.
Post # 11
@hgwells: I just finished law school and I will for sure be inviting the professor who was a mentor to me. I took several of his classes and I was his research assistant as well. I see no problem inviting him, even if you are still in law school. My fiance actually wants him to officiate the wedding!
Post # 12
@hgwells I would not worry too much. I do recognize a difference in that this person would still be in your professional world (unlike the other professors – legal community is small). At the same time, I think as long as you are not rolling around on the floor drunk, there wouldn’t be anything at all negative about that. I am only not 100% sure on the legal professor because I was a little closer, personally, to those other teachers. But I play with the idea of inviting the law professor I was an RA for — I have not put him on the list yet because we are still pinning numbers down.