Post # 1
I really do appreciate getting an invite to my friend’s kids b’day parties. But, quite frankly, it’s only my very best friend’s whose kid’s party I want to go to.
For whatever reason, I’ve been invited to quite a few morning parties lately. The latest one is a 9am, Saturday party for a 2 year old. I like the family, heck – I like the kid. But going to a 9am b’day party on a Saturday just doesn’t sound like fun.
Last month, I went to a closer friend’s daughter 1-year old party (also 9am on a Saturday!) and while the event was a bit painful (soooo many kids! and at a park) it really meant a lot to her that I was there to share that important event in her life.
Anyway – my point in asking this question is: as a parent, does it mean a lot to you to have your kid-less friends show up to your kids party? I mean, the kid doesn’t care – I’d be showing up for the parents, not the kid. Or, do you understand that kid-less friends may not really want to go to a 2-year old party? Or, does it matter, based on how close you are to that friend?
Post # 3
Unless it was my very best friends or family member- no I wouldn’t go. I’d send a nice card though! I think ppl think we need to make a huge deal out of kids birthdays, when I was growing up we’d have mainly close family party and once every few years or so we’d get the larger party. It made the years with a big party more memorable and super special. I’ll do that for our soon to be baby. 🙂
Post # 4
@oracle: I don’t have any children, but most of my friends do. I usually don’t attend birthday parties unless I’m really close to that person. I would be much more inclined to go to the party of my best friend’s child as opposed to the girl I was friends with in high school but haven’t spoken to in 5 months.
Most parents understand that people without children don’t really want to spend a Saturday morning with a large group of toddlers.
Post # 5
Good question. I think it depends on what kinda party the parents want. If they want it to be strictly about their child, then I’d think they should only invite the people closest to them. I’ve been invited to TON of children’s parties, and I haven’t had my baby yet. But it was evident to us that it was really more of a family party as opposed to a kid’s birthday party. An excuse to have friends and family get together. However, if I was invited to a 9am party… I would probably opt out and send a gift!
Post # 6
I know it’s not what you were asking about, but I just decline these types of invitations unless its for family. My closest friends who have kids knew that I don’t care much for kids before they had them, so they don’t invite me to join them for kid-centric activities. I have a couple of friends that lost all interest in ever doing anything that didn’t involve their kids in a very direct way, and so it was natural that we drifted apart.
Post # 7
Any parents care to chime in?
Post # 8
@oracle: Lol, we skipped out on having a party for Addie (and we probably will next year, too), so I’m not much help.
However, we’ve been attending a lot of 1st birthday parties for Addie’s friends, and the majority of people there have kids or are family members. At one party, a single, childless friend of the father’s showed up, and my husband and I both commented how weird it was. We’re both convinced there was something going on behind the scenes…
If you’re not super close, I think it’s fine to decline the invite. They will be so busy, they won’t even miss you.
Post # 9
I would say things like the 1st birthday party is pretty important and often is more centered around adults than kids!
We try to make an effort to go to family birthdays (nieces/nephews/etc).
Post # 10
I’ll be a mom in 8wks, so I’ll chime in. I wouln’t go. I didn’t before I was pregnant. I just don’t see why I’d need to be there. For my baby’s 1st birthday, it’ll be something small with just family and a little cake for her/him to eat. I’m not big on birthday parties, especially every year. It’s annoying at some point.LOL A small one for immediate family, aunts/uncles, grandparents, but not everyone you know.
Post # 11
Generally the only kid-less adutls we’ve invited were family. We do have a handful of friends that we’re close with from church that just love the Munchkin so if they were invited they may come.. idk though. lol
Post # 12
I have a couple of close friends who have kids, and those are the only kid parties I go to besides family. Most friends don’t even bother to invite us, and why would they? Hubs doesn’t even come unless its family. Its just weird, as we have no kids and certainly don’t want to hang out with a bunch of them at one time!
Post # 13
I’d say it depends on how close you are to the friends and the kids. We’ve invited our friends to our kids’ birthday parties and if they come, awesome, if not, no big deal. Usually, if they don’t get to come that day, they come later with the presents for the kids.
HOWEVER, these are also my FI’s best friends from childhood who I’m also close friends with now. They’re “uncles” to our kids and one, now, is in a serious relationship with someone (one of my bridesmaids) who has two daughters.
So, I’d say it depends on the people involved.
Post # 14
I don’t think you need to be in a relationship or be a parent to care about and love someone else’s child. Nor do you need to be family. I have friends who are closer to my child than some of my more extended family members are. Heck, my one friend has spent more time with my child than my own mother has! Especially when they are babies and toddlers, it’s all about celebrating life. Just make sure the party you are throwing is appropriate for the guests you are inviting.
Post # 15
I would go to the 1st birthday party, the ones I’ve been to are more about the adults. Anything after that is usually just for the kids with kids activities, etc. I have gone but I’ve felt terribly out of place and occasionally like on on-hand babysitter (because I don’t have a kid of my own to watch, I somehow was expected to watch and help with everyone else’s). But I always send a gift and for the kids I’m close with, I take them out for ice cream, bowling or something special for their birthday.
Post # 16
My daughter isn’t here yet, but I could totally see us inviting our friends that don’t have kids to her birthday parties. We’re so close to them, they’re the baby’s “unofficial aunts and uncles” anyway. Plus, you’ll have the kids doing the bounce house or eating cake or whatever, and the adults mostly just hang out and talk with each other and stuff. That’s how it’s been at my niece and nephew’s birthday parties.