Inviting OOT family to shower you know won't come?

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Inviting OOT family to shower you know won't come?

posted 3 months ago in Parties
poll: Invite OOT family who def won't come?
Yes, at least let them know you are extending offer : (8 votes)

80 %

No, they will wonder if I'm expecting them to spend money to travel : (2 votes)

20 %

10 votes

Member

330 posts

Helper bee

prncss47 July 2012 OC, California

I need some opinions please. We are trying to decide if we should be inviting some of our closer family to my bridal shower. We're 99% sure they would not be traveling the 6+ hrs to attend and I'm worried they will wonder if I'm inviting them for just a gift, or wonder why I would expect them to come when already spending so much to travel for the wedding itself.

On the other hand, I definately don't want to hurt their feelings or offend them by not inviting them at all if they were at least expecting the offer.

What do you think?

3 months ago

Member

1,727 posts

Bumble bee

les105 May 6, 2012

I'm having this exact same dilemma with my shower as well as my engagement party. My future ILs are throwing an engagement party for us in MT (my FI's family all lives here, and we just moved here), while my family mostly lives in OH. I decided to send out invites to my extended family, since an eparty is not a gift giving event, I thought they'd like the gesture.

Now, I'm torn on the shower, which will be held in OH. I have a couple of aunts/uncles who are not in OH (but are originally from there), and I don't know if I should invite them! Not to mention the MT relatives, who I'm sure won't travel, but might be offended since an eparty invite was extended to my relatives in OH.

Too many decisions! lol

3 months ago

Member

563 posts

Busy bee

lindsey_k_16 June 9, 2012 Muskegon, MI

In our family we invite OOT guests to the shower. It is a rude thing if you don't. We never expect them to make the hike to attend, or expect a gift. But in my family it's sort of a shun if you don't get an invite to the shower but get one to the wedding.

3 months ago