Post # 1
I feel like I know the answer to this – but wanted to hear what people think. We have a couple of friends who are going to be getting married next year a month or two before we do that we currently have on our guest list. We would love to invite them, but we’re not 100% sure if they will actually invite us to their wedding. Would it be awkward if we invite them to our wedding but we don’t actually get invited to theirs? We are thinking of sending Save-The-Date Cards in December/January and we’re not sure if they’ll even be sending Save-The-Date Cards out so there probably will be no way of knowing until closer to the date.
Is this a dumb question? Beacuse we should probably just invite them regardless of what they might do – right? Thoughts?
Post # 3
@MrsBillyBall: right. If you want then there invite them when if you don’t think you will be invited to theirs. Are they having a smaller wedding?
Post # 4
@MrsBeck: actually not sure what type of wedding they’ll be having. We are actually having a wedding on the smaller side, which is making us think more carefully about who to invite and so we weren’t sure if it would just be awkward or weird if we weren’t invited to theirs and we decided to invite them to ours.
Post # 5
@MrsBillyBall: Invite them if you want them at your wedding and they make the cut budget- wise.
It doesn’t matter if they do or do not invite you to their wedding.
Post # 6
If you’re really concerned about it, then don’t send them a STD and wait to see if you get an invitation to their wedding before making the decision on yours
Post # 7
I would say like the pp’s if you want them there invite them, simple as that. I don’t think its really a tit for tat kind of thing. If you really want them there, and can afford to have them there, that should be the deciding factor. I’m sure thats how they are looking at it with their invitations/guest list too.
ETA: Would it be awkward? I don’t know, only you can answer that. Would you feel awkward inviting them, and then they don’t invite you guys?
Also, honestly it sounds as if you don’t really care if they show up or not. If you’re only justification in inviting them is only if they invite you to their wedding as well.
Post # 8
Invite them if you want them there, regardless of their wedding.
I invited friends from college to my wedding when they did not invite me to their wedding a few months prior. They had their reasons, whatever, but I did want them there so I invited them regardless 🙂
Post # 9
It doesn’t matter if they invite you, you should invite people to your wedding based on who you want there, not based on whether or not you get an invite to their wedding.
Post # 10
@MrsBillyBall: kinda sounds like a tit for tat thing… that you will only invite them if they will invite you. if you really want them at your wedding, you will invite them no matter what.
we weren’t invited to my fiance’s friend’s wedding (no big deal), but i’m pretty sure he’s looking to be invited to ours (we’re having a destination wedding)… i dont want to invite him and his wife not bc we weren’t invited to their wedding, but bc our wedding is small, and is for close family and close friends, and well… he’s not a close friend and neither is his wife!
Post # 11
Who cares if they invite you? If they don’t, bfd. What matters is that you have the people you want at your wedding.
Post # 12
Thanks for everyone’s thoughts! Yeah, you guys are right – it shouldn’t really matter whether or not they invite us. All of your comments helped put it in perspective. Thanks so much!