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I said no, only because I see no reason for her to be invited. It seems pointless if neither of you are that close to her.
I think exes at weddings are fine, but it doesn't sound like either of you are actually friends with her. I wouldn't invite her just b/c she invited you guys to hers.
Oh why oh why do so many brides look for drama? Of course she doesn't need to be invited!
Looking for drama? are you talking about me???
I am just afraid of anyone's feelings getting hurt.
DH had a serious gf of three years. She left him not bc she didn't love him, but for other reasons. They cut contact for a few months to be able to heal, and then they remained friends.
I started dating DH 9 months after they separated. We see his ex from time to time and she is really nice, I actually enjoy spending time with her.
When DH told her we were engaged (I wasn't there, didn't feel it was my place to tell her), she cried. Because he was such a big part of her life, and I guess, it's always weird/difficult to know someone you loved very much is moving on for good... I don't know..
We did not invite her to the wedding. I did not want to be walking down the aisle with someone in the assistance thinking how it could have been her.
We still see her from time to time, and she never asked why she didn't get an invite. No hard feelings there. But no, I personally do not think that exes (important ones) should be invited to weddings... I say important bc it all depends on situations, how serious it was and all... my best friend is an ex I dated in high school, my first love, but it was 10 years ago and there is definitely nothing there, and I was at his wedding, and we invited him to ours...
I would only invite her if you're having a very large wedding and inviting everyone who invited you to theirs. You're not obligated to recriprocate wedding invitations and it sounds like other than that, regardless of her history with your fiance, you're not all that close with her.
We're inviting several of each of our exes to our wedding - it's not that that bothers me. It just seems like unless you're having a huge guest list, there's probably people who are a bigger part of your lives that you could invite instead.
Well, you can decide whether pleasing your FH's ex is that important to you.
I can say it would not be at all important to me. It's your wedding, you are free to invite whomever you choose. I personally prefer to avoid even potential drama & leave the exes out of it.
DH and I both had an ex at our wedding (and attended both of theirs this summer/fall as well). No biggie. They are both part of our lives presently and so that's why they came! They're definitely friends and I don't think either of us really think of them as "the ex" any more.
So, let's forget for a second that she's an ex. If you don't talk to her, if she's not friends really with FI either, and she's more of a casual acquaintance, I wouldn't invite her. BUT I would definitely feel awkward having been invited to someone's wedding and then not inviting them to mine. Did you go/RSVP yes to her wedding? Did FI think it was weird (from the not really friends aspect) that you were invited to her wedding? I mean, it's sweet she thinks so highly of you guys, but I get the feeling the relationship is a bit one sided no?
I couldn't imagine inviting any exes to our wedding. Unless you're BFF's with them now, there's absolutely no reason to invite an ex. They'll understand.
One of my exes was a bridesman, so I obviously have no issue with inviting an ex to a wedding. With that said - regardless of this person being an ex, it doesn't sound like you are all that close. Would you be inviting her out of a sense of obligation, since she invited you to her wedding? Or is it just because she used to be close to your fiance? When we did our guest list, we based it on who was important to us in the present and likely to still be around in the future, not who we had been close to in the past.
i'm inviting a friend, i wouldnt call him an ex because it was never anything serious and we were best friends prior to the "fling" and have been best friends since. FI is personally a little uncomfortable with it but understands that he has been a family friend for a long time and it was right after highschool, so wayyyy before FI came around,
First, why would her feelings get hurt when it's clear that they drifted apart. Second, who cares if the ex gets upset about it.
If an ex isn't also YOUR friend then they have no business being at the wedding.
forgetting the ex bit i dont understand why you would invite someone to your wedding that you have no real friendship with and your FI no longer speaks to
Don't feel guilty if she invited you to hers, that's like you buying her a gift just because she got you one ;)
I don't think I could do this. It would bug me. Like many PP's have mentioned also, if she wasn't an ex would you even be inviting her anyways. I don't really get the inviting someone just because they invited you to their wedding.
Unless the exes are a permanent part of your life (due to children only), they have no business being invited to your wedding, and even then it would be awkward for everyone involved, as well as for other guests, which will put a damper on the event. They are a part of your past (and not your present) for a reason.
It's not a case of her being an ex or not, that is beside the point.
You aren't friends, don't talk on a regular basis etc. So she doesn't get an invite. I'm sure that there are many other people that your FI knew for a long time who aren't being invited because they aren't a current part of your life.
Not only is she an ex, but it doesn't seem like either of you really speak to her regularly or anything. I wouldn't invite her.
I'd also say no - I considered saying go for it, because she did invite you to hers, but when it comes down to it, neither of you are that close with her. I know personally, I couldn't deal with having an ex at my wedding.
The only reason I could think of to invite FI's ex to the wedding would be to show off the lovely affair I put on which is selfish and horrible. If you are not close to her and your FI doesn't care either way, I'd say that's an easy guest to cross off the list.
If she was someone else that one of you knew a long time ago, would you invite her? I wouldn't. We didn't invite people that we aren't in touch with anymore.
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I will keep this short and sweet.
My fiance had a girlfriend he dated for 5 years. They lived togther. "Casually" talked about marriage.They were basically high school sweethearts.
She found me on facebook, and we became "friends." We chat every now and then, but i would not consider us close friends. I attended one social event with her. She doesn't talk to my FI anymore, but I know at one point she was a huge part of his life. She invited us her wedding.
To invite her or not to invite her?