(Closed) Inviting the MOH’s parents to the wedding? Help!

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: In my position, would you invite MOH's parents?
    Yes, I would invite them. : (38 votes)
    73 %
    No, I wouldn't invite them. : (11 votes)
    21 %
    Other (and I'll explain below). : (3 votes)
    6 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2854 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    Honestly… I’d probably invite them. We fall out of touch with some people as we get older and life gets in the way, but they seem to really want to help you on your day, and if you had a relationship with them growing up this might be nice way to try to continue that.

    Post # 6
    Member
    7779 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    We invited my MOH’s mom and her boyfriend/life partner/common law spouse (it’s a strange situation, lol). I wasn’t originally planning to, but then her mom started asking me lots of questions about the wedding and I got the sense that she would be really sad if she wasn’t invited. My situation is a bit different because my MOH lives with her mother and I see them all the time, though.

    In the end, she had a wonderful time and I’m glad I invited them. In the scope of a wedding, it’s 2 more people. *shrug*

    Post # 8
    Member
    4824 posts
    Honey bee

    My mom has hosted a ton of stuff over the years for me (because I dont live in the area) like a bridal shower etc and she told me to specifically tell the bride that she is not to be invited just because we are using her space. Its not a tit for tat. She was happy to do it because it was a friend of mine, it was not an invitation grab.

    I do not think you have to if you didnt/dont have a close relationship with them. I do think you should send them a nice thank you note and a hostess gift though.

    EDIT: especially since I actually threw it, we just used moms space and she attended.  Will your MOH still be doing all the work and responsible for the costs? If so then you are only using the space and the parents have even less to do with it.

    Post # 9
    Member
    5110 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: November 2011

    I would just invite them. They may come they may not. If they do there is bound to be someone that cant make it, so you wont be over your list hopefully!

    Post # 11
    Member
    3978 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    I was in a similar position. I’ve known my MOH since childhood, hadn’t seen her parents in a few years and we had my shower at her parents home. Honestly, I was planning on inviting her parents anyway, largely because my MOH lives with her parents so I thought it would be weird to send an invite to a house for one person and not the owners of the house but anyway. They are awesome people so I did invite them. Unless you’re SUPER maxed out on your guest list I think you should.

    Post # 12
    Member
    2125 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    I got alot of pressure from one of my bridesmaids to invite her parents, two of her brothers and their wives. geesh….and she’s the one who said it wouldn’t be right if I didn’t! one of her brother’s is dj’ing…but I didn’t know I had to formally invite someone who’s being paid to be there!?! I thought I had made some kind of mistake in ettiquite so I went ahead and sent them all STD’s…but not i’m realizing my bridesmaid was very rude…dont’ give into the pressure. Invite them IF you can afford to. In my case, I don’t mide inviting her parents, because they were very nice and offered to help with whatever they can, but I think she pushed it too far with inviting her siblings and sister in-laws. Oh well, I’m going to invite the wives to the bridal shower if I have to have them at the wedding.

    Post # 14
    Member
    258 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    I voted yes, but I think it really depends on if you have the space and money to invite them.  Personally, I would.  But if it creates a hardship for you or you are having a small wedding, I think it is perfectly ascceptable not to.

    Post # 15
    Member
    1577 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    If space and funds weren’t an issue, I’d probably invite them.  But I don’t think there’s anything wrong with not inviting them either.  I’d definitely send a thank you card if y’all end up using their home for the shower, though.

    Post # 16
    Member
    893 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    @GreenEyedMoon:  If you really like them, then I don’t see why not?

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