Post # 1
Firstly, is a no-host brunch the day after the wedding acceptable?
Secondly, if it’s ok to have, how should I word it on the website and welcome note?
“Monday, September 3
Newly-Weds’ Brunch – 11:00am
Restaurant Name, Address
Sally and John will be having their first brunch together as newly-weds.
Please let us know if you would like to join them (123)555-2345 “
Post # 3
With that wording, I would assume a hosted event. If you aren’t hosting, I would just let it spread by word of mouth that you and your husband will be having brunch at X time at X restaurant and would love to visit with anybody who wants to stop by.
Post # 4
@Zusie: I agree with Sailor. I’d let it spread by WOM but possibly also include it on your wedding website (if you have one). Sally and John will be having their first brunch together as newlyweds! All guests are welcome to stop by and visit with the couple” or something along those lines.
Post # 5
I think any mention of a post-wedding brunch and your extension of an invitation for others to join you — whether by word of mouth, on your website, or in the invitation itself — is definitely going to leave others with the impression that someone is treating them to the brunch.
Post # 6
Agreed with PPs – it sounds like you’ll be hosting them. I’m not sure if there’s a polite way to say you won’t be paying for them.
Is your house large enough that you could get a bunch of bagels and stuff from CostCo and have a drop-in sort of thing?
Post # 7
I just attended a wedding where we went to brunch with the couple and paid our own way. At the rehearsal dinner/wedding, it was just spread by word of mouth. I believe what the bride told us was “We have a room reserved at Restaurant ABC. Groom and I will be having breakfast at 1030, stop by and say hi or feel free to join us before you head out of town”.
To me, that was very clear it was an “unhosted” event and we were on our own for payment. Not sure how others would interpret that though?
Post # 8
@abbie017: “I’m not sure if there’s a polite way to say you won’t be paying for them.”
I agree. I was trying to find a way to include this thought in my comment, but I was struggling with how to say it. You expressed it very well.
I also like your suggestion to the OP.
Post # 9
I agree, WOM is the way to go. We sent invitations for our brunch, but we’re paying.
Post # 10
@abbie017: My wedding is out of town, so we couldn’t have it at a home, and it’s also the main reason I’m considering having a brunch at all.
@LindyLu: I like this wording, but it seems like word of mouth is the concensus.
Post # 11
I liked the wording you had and got the gist that it wasn’t an extension of your wedding, but rather a casual get together.
Post # 12
The rule of thumb (Etiquette wise) is when things are Informal and not Hosted, info is passed by word of mouth (or perhaps the telephone). As soon as you put it on paper… be that an Invite, Note, Email etc.. then it is expected to be more Formal / Hosted.
The example / wording that LindyLu: used is a good one for this situation… and as stated if you have a Wedding Website (invaluable IMO) this is one of those “some what otherwise awkward” items that can be handled on there as well.
Hope this helps,
Post # 13
- Wedding: May 2014 - Paradise Gardens
@sailor: I second your suggestion… you NAILED IT !
Post # 14
I think the idea is fine, but the wording needs work. I’d suggest something like this:
You are welcome to join the newlyweds for a No Host brunch at Brunchies Dinner at 11:00 am on Sunday morning following the wedding.
Please call 555.2034 to let us know if you’ll join us so that we can make appropriate reservations.