Are you a big Craigslist shopper?
more by LonnieBunny
How much was your BM's dresses?
Writing your own vows- Share
more in Ceremony
Outdoor Wedding Rain Plan
Special gifts for special friends - suggestions wanted
more in Boards
How much was your BM's dresses?

Is anyone else having NO kids at their wedding?

posted 2 years ago in Ceremony
  •  
    1.
    Member
    226 posts
    Helper bee
    LonnieBunny    July 11, 2010   California

    I know this might sound mean. But on our invitations we are writing something like that.. and my wording is off.. "please find a baby sitter.. No kids at the wedding" We are allowing immediate family to bring their children with them but thats about it ( there will only be total of 6 kids)

    We are having a smaller wedding and we dont want kids running around.. Plus our venue has a lot of expensive statues all around and we already hiring 2 securities.. So no kids

    Is anyone else doing that? or do you girls feel that its kind of weird?

     
    2.
    Member
    818 posts
    Busy bee
    Miss Sparklespaniel    November 13, 2010   VIC, Australia

    We're having no kids! My cousin has 5 kids (a tribe of little terrors! LOL) so we're just slipping in something with their invite that politely explains that the wedding is a child-free event and that they should feel free to have a night out without the kids! Apart from my cousin, most people we know don't have kids so it's not really a big deal for us. But I don't feel bad having a child-free wedding. I don't want kids squealing during my ceremony. And I'm a teacher so I'm supposed to be all about the kids! LOL! I am - just not at my wedding!

     
    3.
    Member
    767 posts
    Busy bee
    marlew    October 23, 2010   Ajax, Ontario

    no kids except immediate family.  I would love to have all of my friends kids there but the number is too high of a variable for me.  All or nothing!

     
    4.
    Member
    735 posts
    Busy bee
    mander411    November 6, 2010   New Jersey/Hudson Valley

    We aren't having kids. But we aren't adding a statement on the invitations, just addressing them to those invited. It is very common in both our families to not have kids invited so we don't think the statement is necessary. And if people resond back adding their kids names we will call them and tell them otherwise

     
    5.
    Member
    677 posts
    Busy bee
    CaitlinRivera    August 14, 2010   Seville, Spain

    We aren't having kids at the wedding either.  My family were more understanding than I imagine.  I am only allowing kids younger than 2 or over 18.  My little brother of 12 will be the exception! I added a little note to the invitations saying "For reasons beyong our control, we won't be able to accommodate children over 2 or under 18 at the wedding.  We thank you kindly for your understanding".  I think it's best to only address it to those who would bring them.  That way you don't have to have everyone see it on the invitation.  Good luck!

     
    6.
    Member Icon
    31 posts
    Newbee
    suffragettecitygirl    August 10, 2010   Hamilton ON

    We're having no kids!  We are doing RSVPs online and at the top of the form, simply wrote "Please note that this is an adults-only function, and that due to the intimate nature of our ceremony and reception, we are unable to accommodate guests other than those listed on your invitation." And then we only wrote the parent's names on the invitation.  This hasn't been a big issue thus far except with one person who will be breast-feeding (we REALLY didn't want a screaming 3-week old baby there!) who thought she she should be allowed to bring the baby (we didn't expect her to come with out it - we assumed she'd rsvp no!) - but even that was solved with relatively little fuss.  I think it's better to lay your cards on the table as early as possible so people aren't scrambling for sitters at the last minute!

     
    7.
    380 posts
    Helper bee
    MadiLove918    May 2011   Palm Bay, FL

    Add us to the list!  At first, I wanted EVERYONE to come, including children.  However, after taking a look at our venue space and our guest list, literally half of our guest list consisted of children. 

    After much thought, SIL and I decided to ask around to those who have children and every one of them said they wouldn't have wanted to bring their young ones anyway.  So, there we have it!  We are having a "no children" wedding and the parents aren't offended.  Yay! 

    Our 1 year old DD will be there for obvious reasons, though.

     

     
    8.
    Member
    342 posts
    Helper bee
    frugal_faye    June 6, 2010   Michigan and Illinois

    Yup.  Inviting all the kids would have pushed out guest list up by about 30.  When you've only invited 80 people, that's a huge jump.  Our space and budget is too small for it.

    I'm waiting for the fall-out, though.  I'm sure somebody's going to be horribly offended.  Oye!

     
    9.
    Member
    69 posts
    Worker bee
    Annoid    August 10, 2011  

    Thankfully I don't have a lot of friends/family with young children, and so we'll have a max of 5 kids at the wedding.  That being said, my brother is 13 and I have several other cousins around that age, and it's brought up a few questions.  How do you set an 'age limit'?  I think that a 13 or 14 year old shouldn't be excluded because they can certainly behave and appreciate the wedding, but a 7 or 8 year old is too young (IMO).  How does the Invite wording work there?  Also, what do you do with family with a large age difference between children (say, one is 10 and the other 21)?  You can't tactfully invite one child and not the other, can you?  Just a thought...

     
    10.
    Member
    1,187 posts
    Bumble bee
    Champagne Wishes    May 22, 2010   Upstate New York

    We are only having immediate family bringing their children as well since they are either in the wedding party (5 flower girls and 2 ring bearers) or infants.

    On our reception card we wrote:

    Join us

    For an adult reception

    Cocktails, Dinner and Dancing

    Country Club of Someplace

    Address

    Everyone got the hint and understands.  We just couldn't justify $20 for chicken fingers and french fries per kid.  But honestly, we both have family who doesn't do the best job at watching their children and we didn't want to worry about them being watched after.

     
    11.
    3,234 posts
    Sugar bee
    Kittyachi    August 2010   New York

    No kids but it's not really that big of an issue. Very few of our friends or family have kids and those that do aren't close enough to us that they would press the issue. If they chose not to attend because they couldn't get a sitter or didn't want to leave their kids at home, we won't be heartbroken they aren't there because we aren't BFFs or close family.

     
    12.
    Member
    797 posts
    Busy bee
    sboston06    October 10, 2010   Boston area

    In my opinion, no kids means no kids.  That means the immediate family is not bringing kids.  Including my sister/MOH's 3-month old (yet to be born), and my 6 year old niece.  No flower girls or ring bearers either.  I feel that a formal wedding is not a place for kids to be running around.

     
    13.
    Member
    14 posts
    Newbee
    dsherod    August 21, 2010  

    We are not having kids expect for a flower girl for the ceremony only. We figured if we said no kids, that meant no kids unless they are part of the wedding party or it would run the risk of playing favorites. We wouldn't want the message to be 'we'll have kids, except your kids". We do understand however that we have several people traveling from out of town with children, so we have arranged for a babysitter to watch all the kids at one of the hotel rooms so that our decision doesn't end up being an extra cost for our guests.

     
    14.
    Member
    882 posts
    Busy bee
    jmc    12-12-09   long island city, ny

    We didn't have a kids, but we just spread the word rather than saying anything on the invite (we had 110 people so it wasn't that hard).  It was pretty much a non-issue because most people were glad to have a night away.

    If you say something, I would just go with "adult reception" or something like that.

     
    15.
    Member
    709 posts
    Busy bee
    TealaB    May 7, 2011   Vancouver

    Yeah we're doing literally NO kids.  No flower girl, no ring barrier, no immediate family, nothing.  The youngest person will be my 17 old cousin.  But, that is made much easier by the fact taht there are no kids in my close family right now!  The only children would be those of my parents friends, and since we are having a smallish wedding, they are not invited :)

     
    16.
    Member Icon
    Member
    87 posts
    Worker bee
    Skywalk    September 18, 2010   Vancouver, BC

    We aren't having kids at the wedding outside of those that are actually in the wedding party. We aren't writing anything on the invitations as that seems to be a no-no on the ettiquette front. We have let people know that there are no kids invited more informally and will only be addressing the invites to the adults. We'll contact anyone who RSVPs including little people to ensure they make plans for their little ones.

     
    17.
    Member
    882 posts
    Busy bee
    jmc    12-12-09   long island city, ny

    One thing to think about though is whether you really want to let some people (even if it is immediate family) bring kids and not other people.  You might be in for some arguments if you go that route (though maybe not, who knows).  I just think it's good to have a hard-and-fast rule and no exceptions, that will make it easier on you.

     
    18.
    Member
    1,669 posts
    Bumble bee
    menobride    June 5, 2011   NH

    No kids for us, either, but I think your wording could be a little less...aburpt? As you said, it needs some work. :)

    But it's YOUR wedding and it should be up to you if you have kid there.

    That's why we are having an evening wedding

     

     
    19.
    Member Icon
    Member
    170 posts
    Blushing bee
    KaitnJust    July 30, 2010   York Maine

    I have 4 kids.....they are coming to the ceremony but NOT the reception!!!  I think it is a nice time for the adults to have a break....including me!

     
    20.
    Member
    5,975 posts
    Bee Keeper
    SapphireSun    July 9, 2010   Vancouver, BC

    We're having almost no kids.  We're both near the oldest in our extended families, and seem to run in a circle of DINKs (Double Income, No Kids), so even with inviting everybody we wanted, there was only two people who had children invited.  One friend, and my cousin.  They've both opted to leave their kids at home, but one will have to bring a breastfeeding infant.

     
    21.
    Member
    226 posts
    Helper bee
    LonnieBunny    July 11, 2010   California

    @Everyone I'm so glad that ther eare people who are also having NO kids at their wedding. It makes me feel a little better about myself.. I thought it would be mean telling my friends to find a baby sitter but thats why im giving the invitation 6-8 weeks in advance so they can find some one for a day

     

    Reply

    You must log in to post.





    Visit our sister sites eHarmony
    Online Dating
    eHarmony Advice
    Dating Advice
    Project Wedding
    Wedding Songs
    JustMommies
    Pregnancy Calendar
    Copyright 2004-2012, Weddingbee.com
     

    Find your vendors on Weddingbee

    Real reviews from brides in your area!

    Favors by Weddingbee

    • Favors by season

    Shop Now ยป

    Find Registry Find Registry Find Registry

    More
    User Posts Today
    Lyndzo 52
    Brielle 41
    mypinkshoes 34
    his chippymunk 32
    Cady 32
    fivemonthsnotice 32
    TheLionQueen 31
    AshleyR83 30
    This Time Round 29
    ndreighton 27

    Ceremony

    User Posts Today
    monique1218 2
    xlittlemissbridex 1
    CassidyR 1
    ticatica 1
    ladybugs 1
    Jamcnair 1
    Midnight 1
    cuddlz88 1
    greenbuggy246 1
    rebwana 1
    More