Is anyone not having a rehearsal dinner?

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Hostess
7630 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

We didn’t really have one…

We had a quick rehersal the morning of the wedding and bought the wedding party brunch and snacks for the day. It worked out just fine for us! 

Post # 4
Member
1864 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

70% of our bridal party is out of towners and most can’t make it into town until late the night before the wedding, so we’re not. We’ll just have to pre-rehearse the day of. Really hoping we have time.

Post # 6
Member
1649 posts
Bumble bee

@FutureMrsJohnston:  If you had a bunch of people over to do you a favour by, oh, I don’t know, helping you flerm five dozen widgets; would you not ask them to at least stay for a cup of tea after the last widget was flermmed? If your study group is working on a group project until late at the library, don’t you finally say “that’s enough; let’s go have pizza?” Is offering a guest a hot beverage not a non-optional social convention where you live?

Hospitality is a reflex that develops with practice; but by the time you are ready to marry that hospitality reflex should be fairly well developed. A rehearsal-dinner is not required, but you should offer some sort of refreshment once people are finished the tiresome business of marking their places and running through their lines and timing to make your subsequent wedding perfect. And if it is dinner, it need not be catered or fancy.

But your wedding party and other people involved in the wedding are bound to be happy and excited and have lots to talk about: it seems a bit churlish not to give them the opportunity for a bit of socialization after doing you a favour.

Post # 7
Member
311 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I’m not having a formal rehearsal dinner. I don’t think it is necessary, in our case we are paying 100% for the wedding, and would be paying the rehearsal dinner as well. We will be letting our out of town guests (which is most of them) know that we will be eating out at such and such a place if they would like to meet up with us the evening prior to the wedding.

Post # 8
Member
112 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

We are not rehearsing (don’t find it neccessary IMO) but we are trying to have a dinner for everyone that Friday night. However, our wedding party is big and it is very hard to find something affordable that will actually take a party our size on a Friday night (we are looking at BYOB’s mostly).

 

 

Post # 9
Member
133 posts
Blushing bee

If you aren’t having a rehearsal, you don’t need a dinner. But if you plan on having a rehearsal, you need to feed everyone. It doesn’t have to be anything extravagant, but you do need to provide food and drinks. Grab some pizzas or a some nugget trays from Chick-Fil-A. It doesn’t need to be anything fancy or expensive at all.

Post # 10
Member
272 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

We are doing a rehearsal the evening before our wedding and have booked a small conference room for everyone involved to have some pizza and beer. We are using it as a chance for people to get to know each other Smile

Post # 11
Member
133 posts
Blushing bee

@happyheidi1984:  That sounds fun! I tried to get FI to do the rehearsal at the bowling alley but he wanted something a little bit more formal. Maybe next time 😉

Post # 12
Member
3223 posts
Sugar bee

If you aren’t rehearsing you don’t need a dinner.  If you are rehearsing you must host those that you have at the rehersal with at least some snacks and punch. 

It doesn’t have to be a fancy, dinner out.  It could be pizza in the church hall, or hamburgers in someone’s back yard.  If it’s not over a meal time, you could do some veggie platters, and cold cuts.

Post # 13
Member
8419 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@FutureMrsJohnston:  We didn’t have a rehearsal, so we just did a welcome dinner.  Since 90% of our guest list was from out of town, it seemed odd to us to only host 1 event.

Post # 14
Member
4468 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@FutureMrsJohnston:  We didn’t have an official dinner, just a dinner out two nights before the wedding. It was DW and only about 10 family members came for dinner (didn’t invite wedding planners), and I booked during happy hour so everytjing was 1/2 price! I think the bill came to $250 inc tax and tip- really cheap for Maui!!

Post # 15
Member
1242 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012 - Chateau Briand

We didn’t have a rehearsal so we didn’t have a dinner afterwards. I knew the coordinator at the venue would line up my bridal party correctly, etc so we didn’t feel the need to get everyone together to rehearse 🙂

Post # 16
Member
227 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

@FutureMrsJohnston:  Not planning on doing this either, doesn’t seem necessary. 

We have a very small wedding party and I think we could run through this the morning of or just before the photographer arrives in the afternoon. 

My Dad was the one pushing for a rehearsal I think he’s a bit nervous and wants to be sure he knows where to meet me and where to stand.

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